Dating Tips for Shy Men

You think of yourself as a guy who seems to have not gotten over his awkward stage. When it comes to dating, you are still as awkward as any teenager out there, getting dumped easily after a single night out with a girl. Dating becomes a hard task for you and you are now trying to shy away from ever dating for fear of getting dumped again. Well, worry no more, dude. Here are some dating tips that will help you get past the awkward stage:

1. Calm yourself.
You don't want your date to touch your clammy hands, or would you? It's not that you have hyperhidrosis or someone who suffers from excessive sweating. You get clammy and sweaty hands because you're anxious. Try to calm yourself before and especially during a date. Don't think of a date as a date; instead, think of it as a chance for you to gain friends, women friends. This way, you remove any expectations from yourself and won't pressure you to impress your date much. When you're calm, you will say the right words at the right time. And when you are calm, you will ooze with self-confidence and appeal.

2. Fix your voice.
Men's voices should be booming when angry and modulated and smooth when in a casual conversation. This means that your voice shouldn't squawk, most especially when you're in front of a woman that you like. You can do this by practicing at home. Orient the people in your home that the new you has a great sounding voice. This is to make your voice change natural and without you changing how you sound when you're home and outside of home with other people. A modulated voice exudes an aura of maturity. Women like mature men, not in looks but how he sounds.

3. Learn how to smile.
Oh, stop showing your gums when you smile. It might look cute when you were eight, but you're not eight anymore. Your smile should be something that would send thrilling chills down on a woman's spine and make her breathing be labored. Practice smiling in front of your mirror. Practice all sorts of smile that you can make: a half-smile, a full smile, a laughing smile and a naughty grin. Movie stars do it, why wouldn't you? When doing your 'new' smile, it might feel unnatural or uncomfortable at first. It's normal. Just do what you've practiced. In no time at all, it'll become your natural smile.

How to Change Your Looks to be a Hot Guy

There's a formula to be THAT hot guy. A movie star isn't born to be the hunky actor that women drool over. He is packaged by the media outfit and his handler to be a hunk, a sex symbol and a cool guy. You can so, too. Do a couple of changes in your looks and you're all set.

1. Keep your wardrobe simple.
Yes, you value your individuality. You're okay with your over-sized black T-shirt with insignia of your favorite rock band, your torn jeans and your dirty, Converse shoes. You love who you are and your mother loves who you have become. However, you should accept the fact that it's not your mom who you would be hanging out with or would spend a night with canoodling. It's a woman, a beautiful woman and in all honesty, wouldn't dig what you wear. Change your wardrobe with something that would flatter what you have and hide the imperfections in your body. It wouldn't hurt you if you try to buy a nice black, collared jacket from Arrows and mix it up with more casual clothes, say a plain white shirt and clean, fitting, straight-cut jeans. And also, reserve your Converse shoes at home. When you go out to chill out in bars, wear your black, leather shoes.

2. Get at haircut that flatters.
If you have time, go to your nearest salon and ask a hairstylist of a haircut that would flatter your facial shape and structure. Even in men, hair is a crowning glory. If you're one of the unfortunate few who are losing hair, don't lose heart. Go bald all the way! Instead of combing it over on the side (and making you look like Donald Trump), going bald tells women that you don't care about how you look. You are confident and your balding head won't affect your sense of security and your belief in yourself.

3. Avoid extra or excessive bodily movements.
If you're sorry or a bit shy, stop scratching your head. You don't need to look pathetically sorry for what you did or for your embarrassment. Avoid these types of unnecessary bodily movements. Avoid the excessive once, too, say the hand movements while talking or making a point. Be aware of how you react and move in front of a woman. Women find an 'awkward' guy repulsive. Only teenagers get clumsy in front of a woman. Get yourself together and learn how to calculate your movements when with her. It's not easy to do this but with practice and keen sense of self-observation, you'll turn your loser looks into a suave one.

Why Do Some Pick Up Strategies Work?

We've seen in movies how Hugh Grant makes an impression to Julia Roberts and how the latter cracks up to former's pick up lines. You would say: "It's easy for them. They are good looking". They can use the lamest pick up lines ever and still get the woman they want." Although it's true that looks may have a great contribution to getting the woman you want, still, there are other contributing factors why some pick up strategies work. "Is it hot in here, or is it me?"

You've heard this pick up line a number of times in comedic and romantic movies. Many men have used this line and you might think that it has been so used up that it wouldn't work anymore. You might get surprise with this information: many men claim that this overused line still works for them. What is it about pick up lines that make them work? What is it about some that make it oh-so-lame? According to some pick up artist gurus, it is not about the pick up lines per se, but in the way a man delivers it. Considerations to make are the appropriateness of the language to the place, situation and current circumstances. This means that "Is it hot in here, or is it me?" line won't work if you're picking up a nice lady outdoors, during winter. It would sound absurd. Deliver it smoothly.

As mentioned, delivery is the main reason why a pick up line works and don't work. If you mumble while saying your lines, you might not get the attention of the woman you're picking up. Or if you deliver the lines as though you were reciting something straight from the idiot board, you might receive an unfavorable squint from the woman and leave you right there and then without even batting an eyelash. Say your pick up lines naturally, as though you were teasing her. Use the power of side glances and sly grin as you deliver your lines.

The way you look at her is more important to her than whatever it is that you're telling her. In sum, don't focus yourself in making up the best or the wittiest pick up lines ever. Use body language, facial expressions and voice intonation to show a woman your maturity, intelligence, charm and wit. Lines are just lines. They won't matter much if you don't deliver them well. Use your best tone and voice to tell a lady that she is desired and found by you to be utterly gorgeous.

Three Secrets To Make Women Intoxicated By You

In a bar, there are two groups of men: those who don't get even a glance from girls and those who have a throng of girls, throwing themselves literally on these men. If you belong to the first group, you might need to know these 3 secrets to make women intoxicated by you:

1. Believe you're irresistible.
Men who believe they are irresistible look irresistible. It's all about psyching yourself up. In sales, the top sellers are the ones who employ 'self brainwashing.' It's a method in marketing wherein you brainwash yourself to be the top salesman there is and that you can make sales that are of the top of the charts. This works in the irresistible department. If you tell yourself over and over in front of the mirror that you're appealing and you have the thing or the "it" that would make women moan in delight, in no time at all you will be that person. In life, things are just about believing in what you can do and overcoming difficulties about things you can't do. If you think you're not appealing, start writing in your notebook that you are. And every time you retire to bed, tell yourself that in the coming months, you will finally meet and get the woman of your dreams and that she'll be sleeping in your bed, laying snugly beside you.

2. Be laid back and casual.
Have you noticed in bars that men who are laid back and casual gets the prettiest girl in the room? In fact, all the pretty girls are throwing themselves at him. Men who seem not to notice women are the type of men that most women like. Women fall for a guy who doesn't seem to care about women and want to mind his own business. Practice this behavior. Look at women but don't stare at them. Focus more on your drink rather than them swinging their hips in tune to the music. For them, getting the tiniest look from a laid back guy means a lot.

3. Don't overdo your words.
Be natural when talking to women. In fact, the lesser you talk, the better. Talking less prevents you from committing a blunder. Also, limit your praises. Women would feel being lied to if they heard you say "you look beautiful" the 10th time in a single night. If it's not a total lie, it might be that you're obsessed with her. Let your eyes speak for you. If she really looks spectacular that night, tell her with your appreciative looks.

Pick Up Tips For The Dateless

If you've been dateless for a while, you might have difficulty finding a new prospect, or picking up a woman in a bar or anywhere else for that matter. However, being dateless doesn't necessarily mean you should feel like a totally loser. Gather your wits together and try these awesome pick up tips and get yourself a gorgeous date. Apparently women love when men ignore them. I don't really understand it, but hey who knows. I know one thing they do like and that's men that are "stoic".

Bars or nightclubs or what I like to call meat markets are the best place to pick up single and available women. It's the best place to get started especially if you've been out of the dating loop for a while because there are tons of different women!

You may go with friends and do your own thing once inside the bar, or you may also go alone. Once inside the bar, try your best to focus your attention to your drink and not on women. You may do your area 'scanning' discreetly, and use your peripheral vision to spot oncoming prospects.

Women are attracted to men who seem to be 'disinterested' to women. Sounds ridiculous, right? But sometimes, that's how women psych works -- ridiculous and incredible. But women have a rationale behind this behavior. They contend that men who ignore women are those who are more mature and aren't there to merely look for a one night stand.

Go straight up to the bar and just smile. If you've spotted the girl of your choice, smile at her when you've got the chance to get her attention and your gaze has crossed. This strategy is most effective when a girl is with some friends. Your smile is a signal that you're interested to her. And if she's interested too, she'll leave her friends and join you at the bar.

The tip here to make this strategy works is to give her a soft yet quick smile, then return to whatever you're drinking as though minding your own business. You may check up with her once in a while, to see if she's looking back. Just make sure that once you throw that smile at her, you're not throwing the same smile to anybody else, especially to another woman.

If you're checking out on her, she's likewise checking out on you, making sure that she really got your interest and you're not there simply to pick up any kind of woman.

It's easier if she's at the bar. All you have to do is smile at her and go back to your drinks. Wait for a couple of minutes and she'll start the conversation.

Relationship Success Strategies

I have a confession: I was confronted by a friend this past week. She suggested that I might possibly be living more from my head than my heart.

She wanted to know where all the successful relationships were and was asking me, since I am THE REALationship Coach (That's pretty much the way she said it, too!) to show her evidence that these happy and successful relationships really existed.

She was angry. She was hurt. She was sick and tired of the hell of relationship break-up.

She was "mad as hell and wasn't going to take it anymore"!!

It was quite a conversation as I had to use my verbal Tai Chi to dodge her sarcastic and angry jabs, her cynical hooks and her negative mindset about relationship success being more like pie in the sky.

I can't say I blame her one bit. She's right. Where are those relationships?

Yes, I do get to see many successful relationships, but that is mostly because of what I do. But in everyday life, where are they?

Sure, there are many people who seem to be content with their relationships, but underneath their superficial smiles and socially correct acts, the truth is, they are far from fulfilled.

In fact, many of these people feel quite empty. That's why they fill their lives with work, exercise, TV, sports, kids, and even drugs and alcohol. Not that most of those activities are necessarily bad, but too often they are used as distractions and artificial fillers for what is lacking in their primary relationships.

And then there is the all mighty addictive energy. Addiction feeds on emptiness. It will come in and fill any void in your life faster than you say Kalamazoo (I'm originally from Michigan and this is a city there...no comments!!).

This is the hell. It is hell when you've succumbed to addictive energy and are at it's mercy.

It's even more hellish when you don't even realize it. But that is the power of addiction.

Addiction will lay still, like a snake in the grass, and lure you into it's deceptive energy. How?

All addictive behavior feels good, at least at first. If it doesn't feel good, it can't be addictive.

Would you like to know the #1 addiction? You!

Yes, you addicted to you (Me too, as we are all susceptible). We get so caught up in how we look, what others might be thinking about us, how little we have, how bad the future might be, what are other people might be saying about us, how well did we do and how much we have, that we don't even stay connected to life.

And just like any addictive pattern, it will grow and grow until it rules, and ruins, your life.

So, what's the solution? The Heart. Yes, the Heart.

When you stay connected to your Heart, you stay connected to your intuition, your Spirit and your true Self. Perhaps the biggest challenge is to listen to your Heart and to trust it.

Your Heart will also give the truest of self-expression and truth. Your truth. After all, that is all that really matters for you.

But addiction will try to get you to doubt yourself and second-guess yourself, buy into imaginary fear and worry about how others may respond to your truth.

Addiction will also try to convince that everything is okay when, at the same time, your Heart knows otherwise.

Addiction tries to "protect" you from pain. But in the end, it causes more pain than what it originally was trying to protect you from.

Henceforth is THE challenge. Be true to you at your core, in your Heart of Hearts, or be swayed by the deception of addiction.

Want a solid, lasting, amazingly fulfilling and intimate relationship? Stay connected with your Heart. Trust it. Love it. Respect it. Protect it. Don't leave home (ever) without it.

And I thank my friend for getting in my face about all this. I needed that.

Now I'm getting in your face. Do I need to say any more?