Tuesday 26 May 2009

Dating Again After A Breakup

When we break up with someone we always say that we will never date again, that we just never want to experience the heart break that comes with the end of a relationship.

These are words that we have all said or thought at some time in the past, but inevitably we put our broken heart aside and we jump back on the proverbial horse again and get back into dating. After a breakup you may be hesitant to start dating again or you may feel like you have to tread softly and this is okay. You can help to make the process of getting back out there easier by telling yourself:

You're not looking to replace your ex
You just want to have a good time you aren't looking for a serious relationship
You deserve to go out and have fun
Being out and about will make you feel better about yourself

Your conversations while out should not mention or focus on your ex
You can learn to love again
Everyone gets hurt and everyone deserves to date again
You may meet some people who will make getting over your ex a lot easier
Getting out will brighten your spirits
You have a right to have fun even after a nasty breakup

These are some simple statements that you can tell yourself so you can get back out there with confidence. Many people feel like they shouldn't be going out after a bad break up or that they shouldn't be worried about dating again because they'll never love again, but this is the wrong approach. You need to believe in the process of healing and also the possibility that you will meet someone who is so much better for you than your ex ever was. If nothing else, getting out of the house and mingling with other people will allow you to have fun and take your mind off of your broken heart.

Don't make dating again all about your ex though, make it about you. Too many people focus on showing up their ex or making it obvious that they have moved on and there is nothing less attractive than someone who is trying to stick it to their ex. Make dating again about you and your entitlement to be happy.

This will ensure that you have a good time while you are out and that you are truly out there and having fun for the right, instead of the wrong, reasons. Dating should be fun and should be a way to explore new facets of your personality while moving away from the past and toward the future, so get out there and have some fun and leave your ex and that relationship behind you.