MAX Adult Dating

какая чудесная

2011-02-13T12:06:00.001-08:00

Каждый приезжающий турист думает самостоятельно абсолютно уединенный отдых в одном из многочисленных национальных парков где на протажение всего времени, вы, возможно, не встретите ни души либо шоппинг в прибрежном районе.

Австралия государство парадоксов и неожиданностей. Куда не кинь взгляд, все не так, как у нас.
Огромные ултрасовременные города побережья граничат с громадными территориями вымерших, почти безлюдных, засушливых пустынь.

какая чудесная

2011-02-13T11:34:00.001-08:00

Америка царство парадоксов также неожиданностей

2011-01-18T03:30:00.001-08:00

Америка чудесная сторона. Куда не кинь взгляд, все-таки иначе, на правах мы привыкли.
Очень большие современные мегаполисы на побережье располагаются рядом почти бескрайними пространствами вымерших, засушливых, едва ли не безлюдных пустынь.
РАВНЫМ ОБРАЗОМ отдельный путешественник думает сам времяпровождение в цивилизованном районе либо совершенно один успокоение в одном с многочисленных национальных парков где в течение всего времени, вы, возможно, никак не встретите ни грудь.

Супер пупер игра Грибная Эра!

2011-01-18T01:20:00.001-08:00

Срочная новость! все таки стало известно кто обитал УЙМУ лет назад на планете земля. Они передвигались на двух ногах, думали при помощи как они это называли - мозга, существовали в поселениях, и что самое необычное питались грибами!

Австралия государство неожиданностей и парадоксов

2011-01-16T13:59:00.001-08:00

Австралия удивительный континент. Куда не кинь взгляд, все по другому.
Огромные ултрасовременные города побережья располагаются рядом с громадными территориями вымерших, почти необитаемых, засушливых пустошей.
И каждый отдыхающий решает самостоятельно абсолютно уединенный отдых в одном из многочисленных национальных парков где на протажение всего времени, которое вы там будете пребывать, вы, возможно, не повстречаете ни души либо отдых в прибрежной сверхцивилизованной зоне.

Dating Tips for Shy Men

2009-06-16T09:09:00.000-07:00

You think of yourself as a guy who seems to have not gotten over his awkward stage. When it comes to dating, you are still as awkward as any teenager out there, getting dumped easily after a single night out with a girl. Dating becomes a hard task for you and you are now trying to shy away from ever dating for fear of getting dumped again. Well, worry no more, dude. Here are some dating tips that will help you get past the awkward stage:

1. Calm yourself.
You don't want your date to touch your clammy hands, or would you? It's not that you have hyperhidrosis or someone who suffers from excessive sweating. You get clammy and sweaty hands because you're anxious. Try to calm yourself before and especially during a date. Don't think of a date as a date; instead, think of it as a chance for you to gain friends, women friends. This way, you remove any expectations from yourself and won't pressure you to impress your date much. When you're calm, you will say the right words at the right time. And when you are calm, you will ooze with self-confidence and appeal.

2. Fix your voice.
Men's voices should be booming when angry and modulated and smooth when in a casual conversation. This means that your voice shouldn't squawk, most especially when you're in front of a woman that you like. You can do this by practicing at home. Orient the people in your home that the new you has a great sounding voice. This is to make your voice change natural and without you changing how you sound when you're home and outside of home with other people. A modulated voice exudes an aura of maturity. Women like mature men, not in looks but how he sounds.

3. Learn how to smile.
Oh, stop showing your gums when you smile. It might look cute when you were eight, but you're not eight anymore. Your smile should be something that would send thrilling chills down on a woman's spine and make her breathing be labored. Practice smiling in front of your mirror. Practice all sorts of smile that you can make: a half-smile, a full smile, a laughing smile and a naughty grin. Movie stars do it, why wouldn't you? When doing your 'new' smile, it might feel unnatural or uncomfortable at first. It's normal. Just do what you've practiced. In no time at all, it'll become your natural smile.

How to Change Your Looks to be a Hot Guy

2009-06-13T09:13:00.000-07:00

There's a formula to be THAT hot guy. A movie star isn't born to be the hunky actor that women drool over. He is packaged by the media outfit and his handler to be a hunk, a sex symbol and a cool guy. You can so, too. Do a couple of changes in your looks and you're all set.

1. Keep your wardrobe simple.
Yes, you value your individuality. You're okay with your over-sized black T-shirt with insignia of your favorite rock band, your torn jeans and your dirty, Converse shoes. You love who you are and your mother loves who you have become. However, you should accept the fact that it's not your mom who you would be hanging out with or would spend a night with canoodling. It's a woman, a beautiful woman and in all honesty, wouldn't dig what you wear. Change your wardrobe with something that would flatter what you have and hide the imperfections in your body. It wouldn't hurt you if you try to buy a nice black, collared jacket from Arrows and mix it up with more casual clothes, say a plain white shirt and clean, fitting, straight-cut jeans. And also, reserve your Converse shoes at home. When you go out to chill out in bars, wear your black, leather shoes.

2. Get at haircut that flatters.
If you have time, go to your nearest salon and ask a hairstylist of a haircut that would flatter your facial shape and structure. Even in men, hair is a crowning glory. If you're one of the unfortunate few who are losing hair, don't lose heart. Go bald all the way! Instead of combing it over on the side (and making you look like Donald Trump), going bald tells women that you don't care about how you look. You are confident and your balding head won't affect your sense of security and your belief in yourself.

3. Avoid extra or excessive bodily movements.
If you're sorry or a bit shy, stop scratching your head. You don't need to look pathetically sorry for what you did or for your embarrassment. Avoid these types of unnecessary bodily movements. Avoid the excessive once, too, say the hand movements while talking or making a point. Be aware of how you react and move in front of a woman. Women find an 'awkward' guy repulsive. Only teenagers get clumsy in front of a woman. Get yourself together and learn how to calculate your movements when with her. It's not easy to do this but with practice and keen sense of self-observation, you'll turn your loser looks into a suave one.

Why Do Some Pick Up Strategies Work?

2009-06-10T09:12:00.000-07:00

We've seen in movies how Hugh Grant makes an impression to Julia Roberts and how the latter cracks up to former's pick up lines. You would say: "It's easy for them. They are good looking". They can use the lamest pick up lines ever and still get the woman they want." Although it's true that looks may have a great contribution to getting the woman you want, still, there are other contributing factors why some pick up strategies work. "Is it hot in here, or is it me?"

You've heard this pick up line a number of times in comedic and romantic movies. Many men have used this line and you might think that it has been so used up that it wouldn't work anymore. You might get surprise with this information: many men claim that this overused line still works for them. What is it about pick up lines that make them work? What is it about some that make it oh-so-lame? According to some pick up artist gurus, it is not about the pick up lines per se, but in the way a man delivers it. Considerations to make are the appropriateness of the language to the place, situation and current circumstances. This means that "Is it hot in here, or is it me?" line won't work if you're picking up a nice lady outdoors, during winter. It would sound absurd. Deliver it smoothly.

As mentioned, delivery is the main reason why a pick up line works and don't work. If you mumble while saying your lines, you might not get the attention of the woman you're picking up. Or if you deliver the lines as though you were reciting something straight from the idiot board, you might receive an unfavorable squint from the woman and leave you right there and then without even batting an eyelash. Say your pick up lines naturally, as though you were teasing her. Use the power of side glances and sly grin as you deliver your lines.

The way you look at her is more important to her than whatever it is that you're telling her. In sum, don't focus yourself in making up the best or the wittiest pick up lines ever. Use body language, facial expressions and voice intonation to show a woman your maturity, intelligence, charm and wit. Lines are just lines. They won't matter much if you don't deliver them well. Use your best tone and voice to tell a lady that she is desired and found by you to be utterly gorgeous.

Three Secrets To Make Women Intoxicated By You

2009-06-07T02:22:00.000-07:00

In a bar, there are two groups of men: those who don't get even a glance from girls and those who have a throng of girls, throwing themselves literally on these men. If you belong to the first group, you might need to know these 3 secrets to make women intoxicated by you:

1. Believe you're irresistible.
Men who believe they are irresistible look irresistible. It's all about psyching yourself up. In sales, the top sellers are the ones who employ 'self brainwashing.' It's a method in marketing wherein you brainwash yourself to be the top salesman there is and that you can make sales that are of the top of the charts. This works in the irresistible department. If you tell yourself over and over in front of the mirror that you're appealing and you have the thing or the "it" that would make women moan in delight, in no time at all you will be that person. In life, things are just about believing in what you can do and overcoming difficulties about things you can't do. If you think you're not appealing, start writing in your notebook that you are. And every time you retire to bed, tell yourself that in the coming months, you will finally meet and get the woman of your dreams and that she'll be sleeping in your bed, laying snugly beside you.

2. Be laid back and casual.
Have you noticed in bars that men who are laid back and casual gets the prettiest girl in the room? In fact, all the pretty girls are throwing themselves at him. Men who seem not to notice women are the type of men that most women like. Women fall for a guy who doesn't seem to care about women and want to mind his own business. Practice this behavior. Look at women but don't stare at them. Focus more on your drink rather than them swinging their hips in tune to the music. For them, getting the tiniest look from a laid back guy means a lot.

3. Don't overdo your words.
Be natural when talking to women. In fact, the lesser you talk, the better. Talking less prevents you from committing a blunder. Also, limit your praises. Women would feel being lied to if they heard you say "you look beautiful" the 10th time in a single night. If it's not a total lie, it might be that you're obsessed with her. Let your eyes speak for you. If she really looks spectacular that night, tell her with your appreciative looks.

Pick Up Tips For The Dateless

2009-06-04T08:32:00.000-07:00

If you've been dateless for a while, you might have difficulty finding a new prospect, or picking up a woman in a bar or anywhere else for that matter. However, being dateless doesn't necessarily mean you should feel like a totally loser. Gather your wits together and try these awesome pick up tips and get yourself a gorgeous date. Apparently women love when men ignore them. I don't really understand it, but hey who knows. I know one thing they do like and that's men that are "stoic".

Bars or nightclubs or what I like to call meat markets are the best place to pick up single and available women. It's the best place to get started especially if you've been out of the dating loop for a while because there are tons of different women!

You may go with friends and do your own thing once inside the bar, or you may also go alone. Once inside the bar, try your best to focus your attention to your drink and not on women. You may do your area 'scanning' discreetly, and use your peripheral vision to spot oncoming prospects.

Women are attracted to men who seem to be 'disinterested' to women. Sounds ridiculous, right? But sometimes, that's how women psych works -- ridiculous and incredible. But women have a rationale behind this behavior. They contend that men who ignore women are those who are more mature and aren't there to merely look for a one night stand.

Go straight up to the bar and just smile. If you've spotted the girl of your choice, smile at her when you've got the chance to get her attention and your gaze has crossed. This strategy is most effective when a girl is with some friends. Your smile is a signal that you're interested to her. And if she's interested too, she'll leave her friends and join you at the bar.

The tip here to make this strategy works is to give her a soft yet quick smile, then return to whatever you're drinking as though minding your own business. You may check up with her once in a while, to see if she's looking back. Just make sure that once you throw that smile at her, you're not throwing the same smile to anybody else, especially to another woman.

If you're checking out on her, she's likewise checking out on you, making sure that she really got your interest and you're not there simply to pick up any kind of woman.

It's easier if she's at the bar. All you have to do is smile at her and go back to your drinks. Wait for a couple of minutes and she'll start the conversation.

Relationship Success Strategies

2009-06-01T04:04:00.000-07:00

I have a confession: I was confronted by a friend this past week. She suggested that I might possibly be living more from my head than my heart.

She wanted to know where all the successful relationships were and was asking me, since I am THE REALationship Coach (That's pretty much the way she said it, too!) to show her evidence that these happy and successful relationships really existed.

She was angry. She was hurt. She was sick and tired of the hell of relationship break-up.

She was "mad as hell and wasn't going to take it anymore"!!

It was quite a conversation as I had to use my verbal Tai Chi to dodge her sarcastic and angry jabs, her cynical hooks and her negative mindset about relationship success being more like pie in the sky.

I can't say I blame her one bit. She's right. Where are those relationships?

Yes, I do get to see many successful relationships, but that is mostly because of what I do. But in everyday life, where are they?

Sure, there are many people who seem to be content with their relationships, but underneath their superficial smiles and socially correct acts, the truth is, they are far from fulfilled.

In fact, many of these people feel quite empty. That's why they fill their lives with work, exercise, TV, sports, kids, and even drugs and alcohol. Not that most of those activities are necessarily bad, but too often they are used as distractions and artificial fillers for what is lacking in their primary relationships.

And then there is the all mighty addictive energy. Addiction feeds on emptiness. It will come in and fill any void in your life faster than you say Kalamazoo (I'm originally from Michigan and this is a city there...no comments!!).

This is the hell. It is hell when you've succumbed to addictive energy and are at it's mercy.

It's even more hellish when you don't even realize it. But that is the power of addiction.

Addiction will lay still, like a snake in the grass, and lure you into it's deceptive energy. How?

All addictive behavior feels good, at least at first. If it doesn't feel good, it can't be addictive.

Would you like to know the #1 addiction? You!

Yes, you addicted to you (Me too, as we are all susceptible). We get so caught up in how we look, what others might be thinking about us, how little we have, how bad the future might be, what are other people might be saying about us, how well did we do and how much we have, that we don't even stay connected to life.

And just like any addictive pattern, it will grow and grow until it rules, and ruins, your life.

So, what's the solution? The Heart. Yes, the Heart.

When you stay connected to your Heart, you stay connected to your intuition, your Spirit and your true Self. Perhaps the biggest challenge is to listen to your Heart and to trust it.

Your Heart will also give the truest of self-expression and truth. Your truth. After all, that is all that really matters for you.

But addiction will try to get you to doubt yourself and second-guess yourself, buy into imaginary fear and worry about how others may respond to your truth.

Addiction will also try to convince that everything is okay when, at the same time, your Heart knows otherwise.

Addiction tries to "protect" you from pain. But in the end, it causes more pain than what it originally was trying to protect you from.

Henceforth is THE challenge. Be true to you at your core, in your Heart of Hearts, or be swayed by the deception of addiction.

Want a solid, lasting, amazingly fulfilling and intimate relationship? Stay connected with your Heart. Trust it. Love it. Respect it. Protect it. Don't leave home (ever) without it.

And I thank my friend for getting in my face about all this. I needed that.

Now I'm getting in your face. Do I need to say any more?

Successful First Date Tips

2009-05-29T01:59:00.000-07:00

One of the reasons why first dates can be tricky is the because of the pressure we put on ourselves under to create a good impression. If we can relax then we can stop thinking about what to say next; we can pay attention to what our date is saying. How cool is that?

Here are some useful tips which may help you change the way you look at dating and help take the pressure off yourself:

-Neither your date's house nor yours is an ideal place for meeting. Similarly seeking the company of others to act as a chaperone is also not a good idea. An open, busy place such as a restaurant, a bar or a mall is the safest and best place for any first meeting. Alternatively, why not meet during the day? If you can meet in the city or town centre then you could maybe become part of activity that is going on. For example a festival of some kind and it'll give you something to talk about right off the bat.

-When going to the chosen venue you should always drive your own car. This way your date does not have to pick you up and know where you live and you know that you have a vehicle handy if you need to make a quick getaway.

-Always try to make your dating session simple and short. First dates will often make you nervous. Nervous conditions and complicated plans will not go hand in hand. Make your dating enjoyable and smooth.

-Women should take care to wear something which is not provocative or sexy. In fact it is an old concept, but care should be taken with the first impression. Your date has nothing more to go on than your appearance and how you behave. It is said that first impressions are made in the first few seconds of a meeting. Also, women are far more tuned into body language than men. So men, if you have any nervous ticks or twitches, control them.

-Always wear clothing which makes you confident and that you are comfortable with so you are not preoccupied with a too-tight waistline or a necktie that feels like you are being strangled. It is most important that you should feel comfortable enough to concentrate on the other person in front of you. The clothing you wear should also be co-ordinated and look cool. If in doubt ask a shop assistant of a clothing store on what looks good on you. It's true they will want the sale, but most will also be willing to help as well.

-You should always be specific about the place of the date. This will enable you to plan ahead and also help to choose suitable clothing for the situation. Wearing cocktail attire to a fast food place will definitely will be uncomfortable. Guys the woman here is probably expecting you to decide where to go. So be decisive.

-And most important of all, stay in control by not drinking too much alcohol. In addition to becoming vulnerable to your surroundings, you also create a bad impression. Save the drinking until you're more sure of each other and your surroundings are safer. For women, tell a friend where you'll be.

Dating Again After A Breakup

2009-05-26T03:03:00.000-07:00

When we break up with someone we always say that we will never date again, that we just never want to experience the heart break that comes with the end of a relationship.

These are words that we have all said or thought at some time in the past, but inevitably we put our broken heart aside and we jump back on the proverbial horse again and get back into dating. After a breakup you may be hesitant to start dating again or you may feel like you have to tread softly and this is okay. You can help to make the process of getting back out there easier by telling yourself:

You're not looking to replace your ex
You just want to have a good time you aren't looking for a serious relationship
You deserve to go out and have fun
Being out and about will make you feel better about yourself

Your conversations while out should not mention or focus on your ex
You can learn to love again
Everyone gets hurt and everyone deserves to date again
You may meet some people who will make getting over your ex a lot easier
Getting out will brighten your spirits
You have a right to have fun even after a nasty breakup

These are some simple statements that you can tell yourself so you can get back out there with confidence. Many people feel like they shouldn't be going out after a bad break up or that they shouldn't be worried about dating again because they'll never love again, but this is the wrong approach. You need to believe in the process of healing and also the possibility that you will meet someone who is so much better for you than your ex ever was. If nothing else, getting out of the house and mingling with other people will allow you to have fun and take your mind off of your broken heart.

Don't make dating again all about your ex though, make it about you. Too many people focus on showing up their ex or making it obvious that they have moved on and there is nothing less attractive than someone who is trying to stick it to their ex. Make dating again about you and your entitlement to be happy.

This will ensure that you have a good time while you are out and that you are truly out there and having fun for the right, instead of the wrong, reasons. Dating should be fun and should be a way to explore new facets of your personality while moving away from the past and toward the future, so get out there and have some fun and leave your ex and that relationship behind you.

A Successful Blind Date Top Tips

2009-05-23T01:35:00.000-07:00

The first point to bear in mind about a blind date, is to beat around the bush. Do not just go on a blind date without any basic details or information on the person you wish to date. Plan your blind date procedure a few days ahead and let the plans go around in your mind so that you know what to do and how to deal with situations that may arise. Do not just trust your blind date completely and do not entrust your whole evening or your life in the hands of an unknown person.

If the blind date knows someone who you know well or has been set up by a person you know well, then there is a much larger element of trust there. If your blind date is someone you've met on the internet, then find out as much as you can about your date until you instinctively feel comfortable spending some time with this person.

Instead of making very fancy and elaborate plans on your very first blind date, it is far safer to plan your dating in a casual and crowded place where you both can have a relaxed conversation and be comfortable enough to share one another's views. Besides ensuring your safety, casual dating will also help both of you to get to know one another better. Also in a crowded or a cool place you should have plenty of subjects to talk about i.e. your environment. This helps steer the conversation away from the formal topics of where did you go to school, what did you study and the like.

Try to keep the blind date informal and do not over dress for the occasion. For a blind date you don't need to turn up wearing formal wear but you should not turn up in gym clothes either. Show some taste in dressing; keep it casual and smart. Keep all your special clothes, till say after two or three dates. And men should save their suits for their wedding day. Aim to strike a good balance and create a good lasting impression.

However best you prepare for your blind date it still might not go as good as you would have liked. The chemistry between you and your date might not work well but that doesn't mean you cannot trust or find the person interesting. It might just be a bad day for either or both of you. Keep your mind open, never pass judgement and don't be too rigid. It's easy to feel deflated if the date doesn't go well; the time investment and maybe even the financial investment, not to mention the hope. If you do get on really well, then you'll want to get together again. This is where you start playing the game of should I call her tomorrow or the day after. The conventional wisdom is not to arrange a next date at the end of the first of the date; to leave them wanting more. But this will be your call.

Choose Photo Personals

2009-05-21T02:55:00.000-07:00

When Photos was aboriginal alien decades ago, it had become the best way to abduction memories and contest that transpired in the past. Because of the camera, photos accept become a added basal apparatus to abundance information. Photos taken by our accompany as able-bodied as families are preserved memories of what happened and what we looked like years ago. Some of these humans are our admired ones that may not be absolute anymore. About at the actual least, you will consistently accept a account to admonish you of them.

One affair to agenda about photos is that its use is not limited. Photos accomplish you feel abutting to anyone even if he lives afar advanced and far abroad from you. If you absence someone, you can try ample this blank by avaricious a account of them and befitting them abutting to your affection as if you are adhering them At this instance you will not feel so abandoned anymore.

In affiliation with online dating, a lot of of the dating websites requires you to column your photo in your internet dating profile. When you see a account of anyone acquaint online they accomplish you feel like you can chronicle to them added freely. In the end, it will feel as if you were abutting to them.

Photo personals dating is now acclimated by abounding online daters to allure the absorption of the adverse sex through announcement an alluring, clear photo that can calmly get the absorption of anyone individual online. Its in fact harder to avoid a acceptable photo taken by a acceptable photographer. You can however, go and date online and ask a appeal from your acquaintance or any columnist that you apperceive to yield a acceptable attempt of you and use this in your photo personals.

People will beam your photo personals and this can abundantly actuate your affairs for a acknowledged relationship. You should attending admirable in your photo personals because this can access your affairs of award humans who would adulation to see you in being and accept a date with you. Remember that those humans who accept uploaded photos in a photo personals website can accomplish traffic, and this can be a way for you to become added accepted online. The abstruse is to just column a acceptable one. The blow of the accommodation lies with the added individual cat-and-mouse to accommodated you.

Photos should be able to acquaint something about yourself, it should be acceptable in the eyes and at the aforementioned time will reflect a little about your personality. This will accomplish you become added adorable and adorable for the adverse sex.

Online Dating Networks

2009-05-21T02:42:00.000-07:00

Online apple accept become added and added awash as humans started to get a adhere and accomplish a acceptable use out of it. Dating networks are all-around these individuals from area they can possibly acquisition new sets of accompany and a adventurous partner.

These dating networks lets you accept your own amplitude in the basic apple and you accept the abandon to call yourself in anyhow you want. You will aswell accept the adventitious to accept a set of friends, one of them ability be the one your searching or the accompany of your accompany ability absorption you. Another affair is that these accompany can column comments on your page that will aswell appearance your personality in the eyes of your friends.

This is clashing online dating in accepted but a added organized and fun way to do the dating itself. Their affinity is that they are both application the internet as a average of advice and a way to amend anniversary other. Dating arrangement is aswell authoritative the apple abate in a faculty that humans can be affiliated with anniversary added wherever they are.

Dating arrangement is authoritative a hit amid adolescence because they are not in a way announcement affair but for friendship’s sake. Adventurous relationships will chase if both parties are activity the charge for adulation as partners.

From Dating Loser to an Irresistible Guy

2009-05-20T03:13:00.000-07:00

It's fine to get rejected once. But thrice in a row? That's altogether inexcusable. You should have done something to yourself before you let yourself be dumped three times in a row. Surely, the guy behind your getting (you) dumped looks hunky and cool, but it's not an excuse that you should make to yourself. Implement a plan of action now! Go and transform yourself into a charismatic guy.

1. Regulate your voice.
Try to sound more mature than your age. If you could modulate your voice a nick deeper, the better. A low baritone voice is one of the qualities in men that many women seek. Women detest immature sounding men with lots of errs and uhms when stringing along sentences. When you speak, modulate and speak clearly. Remove unnecessary idiosyncrasies.

2. Practice the movement of "cool" guys.
Cool guys move around less and smoothly. Practice it at home. Try not to slouch and practice the "cool" stance by watching the movements of "cool" guys in the bar or of movie stars who are considered sexy and appealing such as Brad Pitt, George Clooney and Hugh Jackman.

3. Learn how to stare "nicely."
It's alright to stare, but not much. You might scare women off. Staring nicely here means you should look at a woman's eyes for a couple of seconds, hold it and then release it before she does. Repeat and rinse and stop on the fourth time. Get cues from the woman's body language. If she looks uneasy with you making an eye contact with her, stop with your first staring attempt. Let an hour go by without you looking at her. With this tactic, there's a 99% probability that you will see sparkle in her eyes the next time you look at her.

4. Cut the crap out of conversation.
When conversation starts between you and a beautiful woman, don't stumble yourself by giving her praises that she would eventually get tired of. Women love compliments but hate an overzealous guy who doesn't know how to keep a conversation entertaining and instead adorns his dialogue with flowery praises.

Also, don't be the "very intelligent" guy in the house. Yes, you're a magna cum laude, but don't be a know-it-all and make a woman feel as though she's unintelligent. Once you're together, she'd know how intelligent you are and you don't need to flaunt it the first time you meet or dine out together.

How To Pick Up Beautiful Women

2009-05-17T06:11:00.000-07:00

Perhaps, this question always plagued you. "How to pick up beautiful women?"

Well, let me ask you this question instead. "What comes to your mind whenever you see a beautiful woman?"

If you are like most guys, you will probably be fantasizing about how she is attracted to you and how confident you are etc...

But when it comes time to take action and approach her, you probably hesitated. Well, what is she rejects me? I totally understand that situation because I have been there too.

Perhaps, you will become more successful with women if you are equipped with these 3 powerful weapons.

1) Confidence

Nothing attract a woman more than a brimming confidence. Don't believe me? Ever wonder why so many women fall for jerks?

Ok, before you think you have to be a jerk to attract women, well, you don't have to. You do not have to behave like a jerk to show your confidence. By it will be helpful to go into the mind of confident guys.

What you need to know is that confident men are not afraid to do whatever they want. They are not worried about other people's opinions of them. Of course, we won't be able to cover everything about confidence in this article.

There are many good resources out there that will teach you how to become more confident.

2) Your Appearance

By appearance, it doesn't mean you have to go to the gym and build your muscles. Though it can help if you are a bit skinny like me.

What I meant by appearance is through the way you dress. You don't have to dress like a millionaire or like a model. But you should at least bother to comb your hair and look presentable and clean. And this is definitely something you can do within minutes.

Sometimes, it really puzzles me. A guy will simply dress in shorts to meet a girl for the first time.

3) Your Sense Of Humor

Alright, not every guy is humorous. Or they may suddenly lose their humor in front of a beautiful woman. But the good news is humor can be practiced. Humor can be perfected.

And one warning here. Don't ever attempt to tell lame joke. Chances are, she will feel awkward and might just try to have a chuckle or two, just to appear polite. You certainly do not want to look like a fool. That's what I used to do anyway. You do not want to fall into the same trap as I did.

Tips For Effective Dating

2009-05-14T01:55:00.000-07:00

You got the chance to have your long-time crush to be your date on your Prom Night. You did not know what to do. Well, here are some helpful tips that you might use to impress your date and get to know her a bit more.

First, before that special night, you have got to do some preparations. Like, grooming yourself up to make yourself presentable and likable to your date. Get your hair done, get some manicure. Even guys need to be vain at some point in time. Rent a suit or tuxedo that you are to wear, if you can afford to have custom tailored suit why not have one? It is your time to shine. Prom nights happen only once. Do not forget to clean your shoes or buy a new pair. It is not bad to spend some dime for yourself.

Next, the flowers, of course the flowers! Do not ever forget the flowers that you are to give your date. Pick flowers that are soothing to the eyes.

Then prepare the RIDE. Of course you are to pick your date up the doorsteps of her residence. It gives a good impression to the parents to show that you are man enough to cross their gate. If you own a car, well good for you. If you don't, hmm maybe you can borrow your dad's or your mom's even just for this night. But you got to remember to tidy it up. You don't want to turn her off with your car, don't you?

Most importantly, your manners. Be a GENTLEMAN. Applying this trait ensures a next date. This will also show that you pretty much are mature enough to handle relationships. This will give a glimpse of your true personality. Don't forget to guide her in the way to car, open the door for her. It is not polite to stare at her, so just try to resist staring at her will you? Do not take advantage of her being a woman. You have to pay her some respect. As they always say, respect begets respect. By showing that you are a true gentleman, you can easily gain her trust. She will come to think that you are a decent and trustworthy man. Do not act assuming. Girls hate it.

Next, while in the party. You got to make her feel like a princess. Serve her her drinks. Ask her to dance, in a polite manner. Do not try so hard, I mean you have act as yourself. Do not try to show her the person whom you are not. Also, do not try to be so over-protective, she is not your girl in the first place. If at some point, someone asked her to dance and she agreed, do not block their way or act foolish. Don't act like a kid who dropped his candy and all over it.

Lastly, when the party is over. You got to drive her home safely. So, never ever forget to thank her for the night. Say that you had a wonderful evening with her. That you enjoyed every minute of it. And ask her how she felt. This could start a whole level of friendship between you and your crush.

Hope that this have helped you.

How to Be The Leading Man And Get The Woman You Want

2009-05-11T04:05:00.000-07:00

The perfect woman out there has her eyes set on you and nothing but you. All the men around her want her, give her the attention that any woman would love, yet she would never trade anything for you -- even if you haven't been giving her the special treatment that other men do. Sounds familiar, right? In the 50s it was Cary Grant, in the 90s it was Hugh Grant. By the 21st Century, it was Leonardo Di Caprio with his movie Titanic. These leading men get the right women who love them, warts and all. Amazing, isn't it? Well, you too can be the leading man type and be a suave pick up artist throughout your lifetime.

Read books; it helps. Honestly. Don't believe anyone who would claim that their "appeal" to women is purely natural. Please, that is a total crap. Art of Persuasion is something that has a formula and can be learned. You can also learn it if you only know how to do it exactly. There are tons of books out there that are specifically written to teach a man how to get the woman he wants and keep her wanting him. The basic guide is usually laid out clearly: from giving that perfect pick up line to follow up and follow through. Read these types of books; books that teach you step-by-step on how to achieve the leading man status. It will make you believe that you can do it, will help you boost your self-confidence and give you the "secrets" that men next to you won't ever reveal to you, even if you pay him 10 grand. Invest time to read them. It's all worth the trouble.

Practice. In your head. After reading these pick up books, use your imagination to practice the scenarios given in the books. Imagine yourself pulling a "care to have a drink" line without you getting a "no, thanks" look from your lady. Be creative and create your own pick up lines based on the examples provided in the book. Create different scenarios in your head and give your own take to the situation -- how you would handle a woman and how you would be remembered even after that first meeting. Practice In the wild. Practice makes perfect, so they say. It's true. With the secrets you learned from a pick up artist book, it's now time to give it a test drive.

You might blunder the first time, or you may not. Whichever the results of your test in the wilds would be, don't get discouraged or too eager. Learn from your tests and take note of both the good and the bad. In no time at all, you will reach the leading man status that only movie stars enjoy in movies they make.

Tips on How to Get a Girl to Like You Right Now

2009-05-08T05:05:00.000-07:00

Let's face it - getting the girl of your dreams to actually give you the time of day can be harder than running with the bulls in Spain - but sometimes just as painful!

But once you have found a woman that you can just not forget about, it's time to start a campaign to not only get her to notice you but also to give you the time of day. Figuring out how to get a girl to like you doesn't have to be as hard to master as biophysics and can be done far more quickly!

First, you need to have a ground work to build a relationship with this woman. If she doesn't know you very well, you'll need to make an impression on her ' a good and positive impression. Find common ground or hang out with her outside of a dating kind of setting. Let her really get to know the real you and you'll be well on your way to setting a date.

Next, flirt like crazy - but in a very genuine way. This isn't the time for cheesy cliches or insincere compliments. Only pay her a compliment if it's sincerely meant and not over the top.

And once you have made the compliment, move on and simply let it stand. She'll appreciate your appreciation and won't become embarrassed because you're making a big deal out of her. When flirting, avoid making comments that are double entendres. Instead, simply let her know that all of your attention is on her and she is the most fascinating creature around.

Going forward, you'll need to show her that you are seriously interested in her. One way to indicate interest is to gently touch her when you're spending time together. Reach out to touch her arm or sleeve to emphasize a point. Put an arm around her back when walking together. Gently touch her knee while watching an event together. All of these actions show your interest as well as your romantic side.

To further show how romantic you are, do silly things like placing a flower in her hair or giving her a simple present 'just because' that reminds you specifically of her. Learn what she loves and work that into the conversation or what plans you make when hanging out. This is both sweet and romantic and shows that you are well on your way to learning how to get a girl to like you.

Finally, once you've laid all of the groundwork, it's time to seal the deal. Laying the groundwork can sometimes take only a short amount of time, especially if you already know each other well. On the other hand, if you are new acquaintances, it can take a bit of time.

But when the time is right and your relationship is getting closer, it's time to ask her out. Learning how to get a girl to like you is as simple as mixing your genuine personality with a bit of patience and then reaping the results!

5 Easy Seduction Tips For Getting That Girl

2009-05-04T02:08:00.000-07:00

You meet terrific women all of the time. But your conversion factor is lousy - you just can't seem to seal the deal and turn a woman from an acquaintance to a lover.

What is causing that, and how in the world can you get beyond it and learn how to seduce any woman? It's quite simple, really. If you keep in mind a few important pointers, you'll be well on your way to attaining success and getting the women that you want to want you in return!

Step 1: Women are not cattle; they're human beings. If you think that seducing them by acting lewdly or making crude comments, you've read too many advice manuals that advise you to let it all hang out.

Stop! Instead, now is the time to really make a woman feel special. The more she feels like you are respecting her and really getting into her, the more likely it will be that she goes from being friend to lover.

Step 2: It really is all about your confidence. If you don't approach a woman with confidence, how will she ever take you seriously? But if you approach a woman and are sure of yourself without being over the top arrogant, you are so much more likely to really show her how you feel and bring her to bed tonight.

Step 3: Breaking down barriers with women is all about making them feel like they're at the complete center of your thoughts. Forget acting cool and showing off ' she'll just think you're a jerk.

Instead, sincerely spend time getting to know her. Listen actively and respond thoughtfully. Ask her more questions about her life and avoid any urge to brag about your own. The more you are able to build a psychological or mental connection, the easier it will be to learn how to seduce any woman of your dreams.

Step 4: Don't rush! Nowhere on planet earth is it realistic to meet a woman and seduce her within five minutes time. Not even if you're a celebrity. You don't have to take the better part of the next year to make progress, but it'll take longer than just five minutes to really make an impact.

Give yourself enough time. Better yet, give her enough time. Rushing along will simply make everyone feel uncomfortable. Instead, feel the pace of your involvement by reading the signs she's giving.

Step 5: Once you've made an intellectual collection and gotten to the point of feeling comfortable with one another, it's time to show that you know how to seduce any woman.

Use your body language and conversation to let her know how interested you are. Flirt and touch her frequently to reinforce this desire. Make sure she knows that she's the center of your world right now. If you've laid the groundwork well and don't come off as being over the top, you'll have seduced her in no time at all!

Flirting Is An Art

2009-05-01T02:00:00.000-07:00

Have you ever been having fun flirting with someone and then just as quickly as it all started it stops? This can be a really confusing experience, especially when you were excited about the connection that you had made with someone.

What do you do now? How do you respond to the silence or the lack of flirting that is now occurring? It can be a bit confusing, but don't beat yourself up about it. Flirting is not a science, it is an art and unfortunately your flirting may not be right for everyone that you come into contact with. From time to time flirting can go wrong, it happens to the best of us.

There is no way to really know what happened. A few things could have actually happened. Perhaps the person you were flirt with suddenly got busy and just does not have the time or energy to flirt with you at this point. This may be especially true if you were communicating by text message or email. Give them a few days and see if they don't get back in touch with you before you assume that something went wrong.

The person that you were flirting with may feel as though they were moving too fast and they backed off so that things don't continue. When you were the last to make a flirty move, allow for the ball to stay in their court. If they begin flirting with you again, simply pick up where they leave off, but don't push it. They have to be comfortable with the flirt for it to go anywhere.

You may have gone too far or read too much into your communications or interactions. It is difficult to flirt within the comfort levels of others when you do not know them well. You may have been too forward or just seemed too needy. People don't always know how to respond to those that are flirting with them, and you may have unknowingly been pushing them away by coming on too strong.

Every now and again flirt does go wrong, but it doesn't mean that it won't work the next time around. Don't waste your time worrying about what went wrong or if you can rectify the situation. If someone doesn't respond to your flirty nature there will be someone who does. If you feel an apology is necessary or you would like to talk to the person about it, be prepared for awkwardness.

There is nothing worse than saying, "I'm sorry if my flirting offended you." and someone saying in response, "I didn't realize you were even flirting with me." If you flirt with someone and they do not pursue the relationship, many times it is just better to leave the situation alone and hope that it resolves itself.

Simple But Important Dating Tips for Men

2009-04-30T02:22:00.000-07:00

Have you been out on a few really bad dates lately and you are not sure what gives? Bad dates seem to come in multiples and many times it feels as though it is a process that we cannot stop on our own. While it may have just been coincidence, you may need to get some things in order on your end of the deal, too. If you are sure that you are always putting your best foot forward you will likely find that the dating process goes a lot more smoothly. There are some really simple dating tips that every guy could benefit from including:

Buy some new clothes. Many women are turned off because a man does not know how to dress to impress. When you come to a date dressed like you just rolled out of bed she will think you are either lazy or not respectful or interested enough in her to dress more appropriately. You don't have to buy a suit but buy some nice clothes that will make you look nice and let her know that you care to be there.

Get your hair cut. Sounds simple but many guys don't follow this basic rule. The biggest turn off to a lot of women are men who do not understand the importance of good hygiene. Keep your head and facial hair trimmed and make sure that you always smell good. You don't have to take a bath in cologne, but make sure you don't reek of body odor, either.

Get the job you want. What does this have to do with dating? Everything! First and foremost, when you have a job that you like you will be a happier person and this will translate to a good dating scenario. Also, a woman generally likes a man who has a stable job and has a good work ethic.

Be sure that you are knowledgeable about current affairs. You may think that what is going on in the world today doesn't affect you, but it does, and your date may very well think you are an idiot if you cannot talk about the current news topics. Buy a paper once a week and especially on the morning of date night's so you keep abreast of important issues.

Don't let a woman think that sports come before her. You can like sports, you can love sports, but the minute a woman thinks that sports come before her she tunes out. If you mention sports and she is not interested, then find other things to talk about. You can love sports and still keep a woman, you just have to be willing to find that balance.

These are some great tips that just about any man can benefit from. Whether you are newly single, just on the dating scene, or have been dating for years you will find that these seemingly simple dating tips really can turn your love life around in a hurry. Put an end to those lousy dates by following these simple tips, you may be surprised how fast these simple things really turn your dating life around!

Do You Really Want Your Ex Back

2009-04-27T02:02:00.000-07:00

What I am trying to get at here is abuse. Sometimes it is hard to detect because our judgment has been clouded. There are three types of abuse: physical, mental and verbal. If you think you are a victim of abuse, then I hope this will prove to be of value to you.

Physical abuse is obviously the most common, and well as the most dangerous. If your ex has ever hit or shoved you, or thrown things at you, you need to seek help immediately. This is nothing to play around with, and if your ex has hit you once, it is a pretty much guarantee that it will happen again and again. This type of aggressive behavior is unacceptable and no one deserves to be treated this way.

Mental abuse can be deadly in a way that it can tear your self-esteem down, and convince you that you are not worthy. This type of person will torment you and lead you to believe that no one in his or her right mind would ever want you. You must understand that this is their own insecurity speaking.

Some of the characteristics of the person who is mentally abusive would be the possessive and controlling person. Often mental abuse is not detected until later on in the relationship. When we are in love, we have a foggy perception of things, and we tend to make up excuses for the other person, or perhaps we just get comfortable and we overlook things.

Some forms of mental abuse are not quite as obvious as others, for example, being judgmental and critical, of not just you, but your friends and family as well. Being critical of you, everything about you, your hair, nails, clothing, your size, the cleanliness of your home, your car.

Being judgmental of your friends and family. If your ex judges people around you, they are probably judging you as well, and in my opinion, it is wrong to judge, critcize and condemn other people, and you want to steer far away from this.

The last one is pretty obvious, if your ex is the type to scream and yell and call you names, you may want to re-think your situation, to determine whether or not you even want to get your ex back.

Most often, the person who is verbally abusive will belittle you, not only to you, but also in front of your family and friends. Pay close attention to how they talk to you and about you especially in front of your family and friends. If they are saying unkind things about you or to you, do some serious soul searching before you attempt to get back with your ex.
Everyone deserves to be happy, it is your birth right, so claim it!

If you have noticed any of the 3 types of abuse in your relationship with your ex, take my advise and do some serious soul searching. We are only put here on this earth one time, and it is much easier to be happy with who you are with.

For the ones that have not noticed any of the above, I am very happy for you and I would recommend you read more below on about how to get your ex back. Word of cautious, this stuff will blow your mind away. Not the typical information that you hear.

Casual Dating - Dating Just To Have Fun

2009-04-24T01:20:00.000-07:00

If you are like a lot of people you like to spend time with others but you aren't necessarily looking to have a long term relationship. This can be a great way to date because you get to spend time with some really interesting people but you don't have any responsibility or commitment to them other than to show them a good time for the night. While keeping this casual when dating may be exactly what you want to do, you may find that it is more difficult to find people who feel the same day.

Casual dating is the act of dating just to have fun, with no desire for commitment or moving forward with the people that you spend time with. There's nothing wrong with dating this way and that is why it has become really popular. Who said you had to date just in an attempt to find a relationship? You don't have to, you can date just to have fun. Sure, you can date the same people each time, as long as you both know that the interaction is not leading to anything more serious or committed.

The problem with this type of dating is that the people you go out with may say that they are not looking for anything serious but you'll soon find that they are. A lot of people think that casual dating is a great idea for them, but when they start actually participating in this type of dating they begin to want to get closer to the people they are with, making for some awkward moments.

There are also those people who say that they want to keep it casual but they also want to make sure that you aren't dating anyone else! This is not casual dating and if you find someone like this you need to explain to them what your goals for dating are, and that is just to have a good time with the person that you are with. Let them know that while you like them, you cannot commit to them.

This is not to say that there are not people out there who are looking for the same thing you are. There are a lot of them, you just have to be clear about what you are looking for up front. When you tell the people that you date right away that you are not looking for anything serious and that you like to keep things really casual you may find that you thin the herd a little bit so you don't have to suffer through any of those awkward moments or clingy dates later on down the road.

What To Do When You Are Dating A Shy Man

2009-04-21T03:49:00.000-07:00

There is something exciting and mysterious about a shy man. You may find that you are very attracted to him, and then nothing. Shy men can be hard to figure out if you don't know what your doing. A lot of women assume that the man just is not interested, but generally this is not the case. Remember? He's shy!

So, you're dating a shy guy and you find that you just cannot relate to his introverted nature. Instead of balking at his shyness, embrace it! Let the guy know that you appreciate his personality because it shows that he is real and not full of arrogance and ignorance like other people. Let him know that while he is quiet that you find what he does have to say is always very profound and that is why you like him so much. This is a great way to build up his confidence and get him to start opening up to you despite his shy disposition.

Take an interest in who he is aside from the shyness. If he has a hobby that he shares with you, ask him a lot of questions about it and show him that you are interested. When he feels like you have accepted this one aspect of his life he may feel an instant kinship with you that will allow him to open up and leave that shy behind. Behind every shy exterior is usually a very interesting interior, you just have to work to get him to show you that part of himself. Taking a true interest in him and what he does will help you see that part of him.

When you date someone shy you need to be comfortable being yourself. If you come across as totally fake than he will be less likely to open up and allow you to get to know who he is under all that shyness. Be comfortable just being you, share the odd things about you, share things with him about your life, what you like. As you show him who you are, he will probably feel more comfortable showing you who he is. You may be amazed to find that he is so much more intelligent, charming, and just well rounded than you ever would have imagined. Being yourself with a shy guy is a huge pay off!

Don't force him into social situations until he is ready. Many women finally get their shy guy to open up to them and they want to take him out to a party with friends. If he is not outgoing in social situations you may need to give him a bit more time just being open with you before he'll have a good time hanging out with your friends. Remember, he's shy and you need to have him feel 100% comfortable with you before you can assume that he is going to open up to any of your friends.

Secrets Why Men Leave Women

2009-04-18T03:48:00.000-07:00

The first secret is that we stopped doing our normal activities. Whatever you do, do not stop working out, going to church, doing your errands, hanging out with your girlfriends, just because he calls and wants to see you tonight. A man does not want you to stop being who you are. You should not give up your life, keep a day planner of activities, and do not cancel your plans, you can let him know what time is good for you once you have finished what you have to do.

Another reason a man leaves a woman is because she does not accept him for who he is, and is always trying to change him. Everyone has their own faults; you have to decide whether or not those faults are deal-breakers. It is ok to let him know how you feel, but otherwise, you will have to give him space to be himself.

Lack of appreciation is another common reason why men leave women. I think we have all been guilty of this at some time. We tend to get comfortable in the relationship and simply we do not think it is as important as it was in the beginning. Make sure and tell him thank you when he takes you out to dinner, tell him it is good to hear from him when he calls. Tell him looks nice. If he fixes something for you, make sure and compliment him. Everyone wants to be appreciated.

Another popular reason why a man leaves a woman is because she is overbearing. A woman who demands all of his attention, and keeps in sight at all times. This makes a man feel smothered, and he just wants to do what he wants to do without her interference. Maybe she is always telling him what to do, what to wear, always giving unsolicited advice. He could interpret that as she is trying to run his life.

Being over possessive and not giving them space and freedom is another common reason why men dump women. Nagging falls into this category as well. Nagging and complaining will make the man fell like they want to escape.

If your man has or is falling away from you, you can get him back. You must discover the secret ingredient a man requires in a serious relationship and if you give it to him, he will never leave. It's never too late to get him back, no matter what mistakes you have made.

Secrets Why Women Leave Men

2009-04-15T02:01:00.000-07:00

The first secret is being too controlling, you may not have even considered yourself as the controlling type, but women sometimes see this differently. Maybe you get jealous of her friends, or tell her not to spend so much time with her friends. You tell her she spends too much money. You tell her that her house is not clean enough. You hinder her from going somewhere she has plans to go. More than anything, you tell her where and when she should go out.

She had a life before you came into the picture and she can still manage her own time and money without your help. There are situations in which she may want your input or advice, but otherwise, do not be pushy with advice or demands. Instead of demanding time, ask for it, give her space and let her make her own decisions.

The next one is being too critical. A little constructive criticism can be positive. Although suggestions are generally considered acceptable, particularly if she asks for them, putdowns and negative are unacceptable in her eyes. Constantly correcting her will make her feel nitpicked and self-conscious. Smart women know that they should not spend time with a man who puts her down.

You must treat her with kindness and respect at all times, and only give her advice if she asks for it.

Another one is not having a life of your own, maybe you sulk when she tells you that she has plans to go out with her friends. Women interpret this as being needy. It is a popular belief that women are clingy and needy, however, men do the same thing. For any relationship to be healthy each partner must have his or her own life.

Making it obvious that your career comes before her. She wants your job to be important to you, and she is proud of your success and wants you to do well. On the other hand, if you start staying late at work, and canceling dates or if you are constantly hanging out with your coworkers after work hours, she will get ideas about your priorities.

Although a woman appreciates a focused and ambitious man, she also expects you to make time for her. This behavior will make her feel neglected, and she will feel like you do not have time for her, and she feels if you really love her then making time for her should be something you want to do. She also knows that if you do not want to make time for her, that someone else will.

The last one for now is being judgmental of her friends and family. You have to understand that these people are important to her and that she will be very defensive about them. Try to see the good things in them, you might actually start to like them, avoid confrontation with them. Do your best to get along with those closest to her. It will pay off in the long run.

If your girl has or is falling away from you, you can get her back. Learn more about the secret ingredient a woman requires in a serious relationship and if you give it to her, she will never leave. It's never too late to get her back, no matter what mistakes you have made.

Three Ways on How to Be Irresistible

2009-04-12T04:44:00.000-07:00

It's easy to get the woman you want, especially if you're as good looking and appealing as Justin Timberlake or Brad Pitt. But if you belong to the group of men who have been thrown drinks right onto their face or have been slapped hard on the face for picking up a woman in a bar, then you might say getting a woman is as hard as perfecting the SAT exam. However, pick up gurus don't believe so. You can be irresistible even if you couldn't pull off a Timberlake dance step or crack that Pitt grin. Below are 3 ways to be irresistible:

1. Make eye contact.
The eyes speak. It tells if you're happy or if you're sad or you are madly in love with a woman. Tell the woman in the room that you desire her. Throw her glances that tell her she's beautiful and that she's desired. Make eye contact once in a while and hold it for a few seconds. The trick would work if you would drop your gaze down ahead of her and don't look at her so often that she'd feel as though she's being stalked. Make eye contact for a couple of times and then stop. Make her want for more.

2. Talk less.
Women still love the old type of guy, the strong silent type. Women believe that men who talk less are men of action. To keep the attention of a woman, let her do the talking and be an ardent listener. She'll appreciate it more than you talking about yourself. Contribute to the conversation if you think she needs a response or if she's asking a question. Be an active listener as well an active communicator. Being a communicator doesn't necessarily mean you should talk and talk; you talk on times when you are expected or needed to talk.

3. Don't flatter women too much.
Although women want to hear flattering comments, they hate it when it seems like you are spreading it on much. According to pick up books, women want a man who likes them for whom they are and appreciate them even with their faults. If you think a woman looks stunning in her dress, tell her so but don't overdo it by telling her all night that she looks great. You can flatter her in other ways by casting her a look that tells her you desire her much.

Three Secrets of Pick Up Artists

2009-04-09T00:42:00.000-07:00

Women want you, women swoon at you, and they can't get enough of you. This is the ultimate dream of any man. And only great pick up artists enjoy it. What is it about pick up artists that make them so lovable? What is it about them that you don't have? Below are 3 secrets of pick up artists and how you can imitate them:

1. Great pick up artist reads.
As they say, knowledge is power. And it holds true even with pick up artists. Pick up artists read pick up books. Where else would they know the trade secrets of dating and picking up girls? Starting right now, read books about dating and collect tips on how to be a successful pick up artist. These books reveal secrets of men who are irresistible to women. Of course, authors of these books interviewed these guys with a promise of anonymity. There is a ton of great pick up books that you can get yourself to study and learn "The Art of Approaching" as the experts would call it. These books will teach you how to approach not just any woman but the most beautiful woman around.

2. Great pick up artist starts from being a loser.
There's no such thing as innate irresistibly. George Clooney is downright good-looking yes, but he becomes a ladies man only after he gained confidence to be The Ladies Man. There were photos of him released on the Internet during his high school days and he wasn't a bit a debonair back then as he is now. He had braces; he smiled awkwardly and had sheepish looks that would make you wonder, "Was that really George Clooney?" No girl in school would be so head-over-heels to be with him on prom night.

3. Great pick up artist is not necessarily "good looking."
Take the case of Marc Anthony, a Latino singer. He got involved with the most beautiful women in the world like Angelina Jolie, Dianara Torres (Miss Universe) and Jennifer Lopez. He's not the Brad Pitt type but, he gets the woman he wants.

Another example is David Spade, a comedian. He's not really good looking but take a look at the women he had been linked to! In fact, he knocked up a very beautiful Playboy girl. That's truly something to get envious of. The point here is looks are not that important to get the woman you want. You need to be oozing with sex-appeal (as women would put it) to get noticed. And sex-appeal is something that can be learned and cultivated. You can package yourself to have an animalistic sex appeal if only you wanted to.

Secret Signs Tell You If Your Ex Wants You Back

2009-04-06T01:26:00.000-07:00

Do you bump into your ex a lot more that usual? And maybe they seem a little nervous around you but don't seem to be anxious to get away, and seem to make up excuses to prolong your meeting?

Has your ex initiated contact with you more than once and they contact you for no apparent reason, "just to talk." Do they tell you things that have happened to them and how they feel about those things? Do they ask for your advice?

Does your ex still invite you to go out places? Perhaps they talk about numerous changes they have made to improve their life. Have they mentioned changing any annoying habits that they know you used to hate when you were together? Do they appear like they are trying to impress you and win recognition?

Does your ex ask you about your private life? Do they ask you if you are seeing someone else? Are they just nosy in general? Do they appear to be jealous?

Are they dating anyone? If not, it is a good chance that they are holding out to see if you want to get back together.

If your ex is dating other people, this could actually be a good sign. Have you heard that your ex is over-compensating for his/her happiness by going out on a lot of dates, partying a lot or pretending like he/she doesn't really care?

Chances are if you are seeing or hearing about this kind of behavior then your ex is truly hurting, and where there is hurt, there are still strong feelings.

Are they showering you with compliments like they did when you first got together? Are they going out of their way to do things for you?

Do they drop hints to let you know they are free? Or do they drop their plans to hang out with you?

Do they still mention places that you went together, or possibly hang out where you used to hang out together? Or maybe they still carry your picture around or wear something that you gave them.

Does your ex talk trash about you? If your ex has been bad mouthing you all over town it is a good chance that he/she is so heartbroken over your recent breakup that he/she is channeling his/her emotions in a negative way.

If you have NOT experienced any of these signs, there is still hope that your ex still has feelings for you, and chances are good that you can still get back together, all you need is a the knowledge to make it happen.

If you HAVE experienced any of these signs, then chances are extremely good that you ex still has feelings for you. For someone to forget a relationship, they will avoid everything mentioned here altogether.

Now, that we have identified the signs that your ex still has feelings for you, what do you do? With a little guidance from an expert, you will be able to win your ex back in no time flat. Right now, the only thing standing between you and getting back with your ex is knowledge.

A Romantic Dinner For Two

2009-04-03T02:22:00.001-07:00

Whether you were introduced to him by your aunt, or found him on an internet dating site, you've got a guy you're really crazy about and you've offered to cook him a meal.

As soon as you made the offer, a thousand and one thoughts went swirling around your head; what do I make, is he allergic to anything, what if I burn something, do I even have a tablecloth? Relax and read on for some hints on making the perfect, at home, romantic meal for two.

Chances are that at this stage of your relationship you've been out to a restaurant or two. Take your cue from what he's ordered in the past, or just come straight out and ask him what his favorites are.

Don't forget to ask him if he is allergic to anything. After all, you don't want to service crab or lobster to someone who is deathly allergic to shellfish.

You should plan for a starter like a soup or salad. Follow this with the main course, which includes vegetables, meat or fish, and rice or potatoes. Accompany the main course by a wine you both like. Despite what you've heard about matching food and wine, it really doesn't matter, as long as it all tastes good. Finish with a dessert.

Once you've determined what you're going to serve, you'll need a recipe. Do yourself a favor and keep it simple. Dig out a cookbook, or jump online. The same way you can find a good guy through internet dating, you can also find great recipes. Just type the name of the dish into your search window and pick a recipe that's not too complicated or fussy.

Make a list of all the ingredients you'll need, and then go through your cupboards and your pantry to determine what you'll need to buy.

Plan your prep and cooking time to coincide with his arrival. You don't want to be slaving over the stove while he's cooling his heels in the living room. Get all your prep done ahead of time, so that all you have to do when he arrives is turn on the burners and give everything a stir once or twice while you both enjoy a pre - dinner drink.

Before he arrives, set the table. Use a tablecloth. If you don't have one, borrow, or buy one at your local dollar store. In a pinch, any type of cloth will do. I even used a (well laundered) white sheet once. Hey, with dimmed lights, he never noticed!

Use your best dishes. It doesn't have to be fine china; your everyday will do, but don't use the stuff with the chips and scratches.

Make sure that the cutlery is clean and polished, and add napkins, preferably cloth ones. If you use paper, don't use a paper towel, which just looks cheap.

Dress up the table with some flowers or a favorite plant. I've also used a small sculpture as a centerpiece.

For the finishing touch, add three of four tapered candles. Dim the lights, or turn them off altogether, and enjoy your romantic at home dinner!

Dating Rules Every Man And Woman Should Know

2009-03-31T02:45:00.000-07:00

Many people fail with dating time and time again and that is because they have never been made privy to some really timeless and important rules when it comes to dating. You may be one of the many people who does not like to date by the rules, but there are some tips that you can follow to help you do better with dating so that at the very least you have a good time and at the most that you have another date with someone that you like.

Don't talk about your past too much. You can talk about where you came from, but don't go on and on about your dating woes or even your dating successes. This will make the person that you are dating feel like they are just a future story and they'll be turned off.

Don't come across as desperate. Many people get really excited about going out on a date, and while this can be very exciting; don't come across as too enthusiastic about the date. If you do this you will seem needy and it will be an immediate turn off for any self respecting person. This is not just on the date, but in contacting your date before or after your plans.

When you are out on a date compliment them. You can find anything such as their style of dress, a new haircut, shoes, or even their eyes. Be careful with too much complimenting though, as it can come across as false and this will be a turn off. Heart felt compliments are the only way to go.

Don't talk about past relationships. This needs to be mentioned because we all tend to do this if we aren't careful. If they ask about a previous relationship you can answer, but keep it short and sweet. If you go on and on you'll appear as though you are not over your ex and your date will lose interest really fast.

Make sure that you are always dressed for the date. The worst thing you can do when dating is to show up and look like you just came from the gym or rolled out of bed. Ensuring that you look your best will not only make you feel good, but will also send a message to your date that they are important enough to prepare for.

These are some simple tips that will help you succeed with dating. You might look at them and think that it is all common sense, but it isn't. Many people break these simple rules every time they go out on a date and they don't even think about it. Now that you have read the tips you can keep them in the back of your mind so that when you are about to break them, you can stop yourself and redirect the date in a more positive manner!

Learn How To Get Ex Back

2009-03-28T03:14:00.000-07:00

You've just had a break up and your thinking I need to learn how to get ex back. Well obviously you can't go tieing them up, but if your able to follow a few simple steps you'll be well on your way. I have been where you are right now just a few short years ago. Just like most people I thought that I could handle the situation. Man was I wrong. Long story short I almost destroyed a 3 year relationship. Thankfully I was shown something that opened my eyes to the fact that I was going about trying to get my ex back all wrong. As of today I have now been happily married for 4 years. Did you know almost 90% of break ups can be fixed? If your ready for yours to be in that percent then keep reading.

Breaking up is never easy but learning how to get ex back can be if you follow the right steps. There are always questions on both sides as to what happened or what could have been done differently. Many times there isn't even a clear cut situation that caused the break up. What is clear however is that one person wants the other one back. There are certain acts however that can kill any chance you might have had of getting your ex to return to you. Look through these and be honest with yourself to see if you are guilty of any.

1. Did you beg your ex to take you back?

2. Have you tried to make them believe it's not your fault?

3. Did you just start apologizing for every little thing?

4. Make promises that you will change for good this time?

5. Tried to make them believe that you will always be the love of their life?

Any one of these things will flush your chances of getting your ex back right down the toilet! What you have to do first is try to get the root of what REALLY caused the split. Do you even know what it was that caused it? Take some time and really look at the situation as a whole. I promise you will see things for the first time you never paid attention to before.

The next step is to open up the lines of communication. Be prepared to take responsibility for your part of the split instead of getting into a I'm right argument. These steps will help you get a good start on mending your relationship and point you in the right direction on how to get ex back.

The Secret How To Date The Girl You Like

2009-03-25T00:01:00.000-07:00

Have you noticed that you may want to get to know some girl more and dare not to make any move? Have you ever been scared when it comes to talking to the opposite sex? Well, you are not alone. There are many other men who encounter the same problem. They do not know what to do and they dare not to speak out what they want. In this article we will talk about how to get the attention from the girls. It definitely will lead you to how to get the girl you like.

There are a few rules for getting attention. There are four rules given here as the guideline. If you can master them, you have a high chance in getting a score in this game.

The first rule is about knowing your objective. You are not going to try to get the attention from someone who you do not really like. This means you know what you are doing and what is the purpose of doing it. It doesn't have to be the sexual goal. For example, you may want to know more about her family on this date. If you can do this, you will be far better than the rest of the guys.
You have to be specific and clear on what you want before you can proceed.

The second rule is to be natural. You don't have to be scared when it comes to making some relationship. They are people like you so there is nothing to be afraid of. Be yourself the most, you will get more attention when you are not pretending.

The third rule is about knowing the occasion. You will have to know what to do in a certain circumstance. You will have to dress properly, talk properly and act properly. You can be noticed but not in a weird way. If you can master this third rule, you are already half way in your success in getting girl.

Understand body language is the third rule to flirt with other people. You will have to understand others language sign and express yourself in the way that makes you look nice and friendly. Remember, your character determines how you can get the girl you like.

Last but not least is your verbal language. How you talk determines almost everything when it comes to relationship. Learn how to master your verbal communication almost guarantee your success in getting the girl you want.

Four Ways to Tell If This Girl Likes You

2009-03-22T01:48:00.000-07:00

When you want to know whether a girl like you or not, can you definitely tell that? Do you have a method to see if there is any chance for a guy like you can get this particular girl? Do you have any difficulty approaching a girl? Have you ever noticed that the more you like the girl, the more speechless you are? You don't even can make your existence in front of her let alone the impression. However, if the girl already knows you, you may want to how you can tell if the girl likes you. This article will give you some tips to tell if a girl likes you.

The first thing to see is whether she likes to have conversation with you. If she seems to want to continue her conversation with you although there is nothing more to say, there is a high chance that she may like you. Normally, if the girl does not like a guy, she will not bother to keep on the conversation. She would like to go on to do something else. You can notice her gesture and see if she is waiting for you to say something more.

The second point to see is that she looks at you a lot when you are around. Some of the girl may not want to make it obvious. However, some don't mind to make you aware of that. You may feel that every time you look at her, she has already looked at you. And you feel that it is not the coincidence. This is another way to tell if this girl likes you.

The third way to notice is that she may want to know if you are still available. She wants to know if you are married or engaged. She may ask you or ask your friend on this matter. This may be the first thing she asks when she meets you or knows of you.

The last point you can notice is that the girl can be attentive to what you say. This shows her obvious interest toward you. She listens to you a lot and seems to enjoy doing so even though what you say may not be that fun. This is a good sign for you if you also like that particular girl. You will have a high chance to win this girl if you go for it.

The four signs you can notice if a girl likes you are exposed here. You can use these tips so that you can determine further move on your relationship.

Top Reasons You Are on a Bad Date

2009-03-19T01:51:00.000-07:00

I am going to tell you about a real date I was on about 5 years ago. It all started when a paralegal that I used to do a fare bit of business with wanted to set me up with her friend. I had never been on a blind date so I thought what the heck.

At the time I had been on a couple of internet dating sites and was having no luck. The paralegal had a great personality, was quite interesting and very easy on the eyes so maybe her friend was going to be similar?

Let's start with first impressions, her friend as I mentioned was quite attractive, my date was nothing short of stunning. I have dated not intentionally quite a few blondes in the past and she was by far the most attractive.

We hoped in my car and took off to a Calgary Flames game. At the rink they have a really good restaurant so we got their early to grab some food as well as giving us a chance to get to know each other.

And here is where things went downhill, first off she was incredible religious. I am well not! Second thing was she talked about herself, a lot. I had at one point mentioned that I had family living in Israel, you'd think this would beg the question "Why is your family living there?" Not this gal she went right back to talking about her mom and the church. They other part that was so amazing to me was the fact that her friend the one that had set us up her husband was Lebanese. Well this gal hated anyone that wasn't white, I am not joking, this gal grew up in the 90's and was a complete racist.

Past all of this the worst part was the fact that she was really dumb, sorry all of you blondes out there this was an example of a dumb blonde. It got so bad that at one point she was still talking away without listening to me that I said "I think I am going to leave!" She didn't answer at all so that's exactly what I did. I left her at the game and I am not sure how she got home, but I felt I had to do that.

In an ironic twist the best way I could explain this to my friends was, she was gorgeous but god doesn't give you everything!

How To Turn Your Woman Date Off

2009-03-16T05:20:00.000-07:00

The following could just as easily be used by a woman to permanently turn off a guy, but I had to pick one gender for the title otherwise it would have sounded rather lame!

So you've finally arranged an actual first date with that totally adorable woman you met on your internet dating site! Congratulations!

You've agreed on where to have dinner, and now you're sweating about what to say and do to make sure that there will be a second date.

Here are some ideas on what NOT to do. You're pretty much guaranteed that there won't be a repeat date if you do one or, God forbid, more than one of the following on your first date. Moreover, you'll likely be getting some extremely negative online dating site reviews, and who needs that?

1. Use bodily noises - Oh yeah, this one's my favorite! I can't remember ever being more turned off when I had dinner with a guy who belched and farted his way through the appetizers, the main course AND dessert.

He thought it was perfectly normal and okay to practically turn it into a symphony of sounds, but I walked out after I finished my steak. Too bad because damn that dessert menu looked soo good!
Save the gas passing, from either direction, for married life. Even then, discretion is always better.

2. Be overly romantic - Guys, we all love romantic gestures, but two dozen roses and a strolling violinist plus a cozy candlelight dinner is over the top for a first date.

Make it a single rose, ditch the violinist and save the cozy candlelight dinner for down the road.

3. Talk talk talk, constantly - Yes, we want to know all about you, but that doesn't mean you need to develop verbal diarrhea. Shut up every now and again so your date can say a word or two.

After all, a first date is about getting to know each other, not just about you getting to know her.

4. Be very nervous - We get it, we really do, because we're nervous too! We just hide it better.

Before you meet, take some long, deep breaths to calm yourself. Extreme nervousness on your part makes you look totally insecure, and we're just not into that.

5. Call her right after your date - Nothing says clingy like calling her on the phone right after your first date.

Provided you both had fun, of course she wants you to call her! Do give it a day or two before you pick up the phone.

How To Break The Ice With A Beautiful Stranger

2009-03-10T04:24:00.000-07:00

There she goes, another beautiful woman you'd love to go out with - in line at a Starbucks, sitting alone down the bar from you, walking down the sidewalk, waiting for a bus, getting out of a taxi, stepping into an elevator with you right before the doors close.

How do you strike up the kind of conversation that could lead to getting her phone number and maybe even a first date?

Approaching and picking up women. Some guys can do it like there's nothing easier, others are so riddled by anxiety and uncertainty they'd sooner face a firing line than let word one escape their lips.

How do you become more like the first type of guy and stop being so much like the second? What can you do so that the next chance you get to meet a beautiful woman isn't just another in a long line of missed or self-sabotaged opportunities?

Do it Alone

First of all, the best time to approach a woman is when you both are alone. Women generally go out in groups, a scenario that provides them a sense of safety and comfort, but that makes it virtually impossible for any man to break through that barrier to strike up a meaningful conversation.

Likewise, when you're out with your buddies, women take note, and while the presence of your friends may give you the artificial ego boost that you need to get off your butt and approach her, it also can make her feel like she's in the hot seat. The problem on both sides of this equation is that, with friends around, you both are in your comfort zone. And your comfort zone is one of the worst places from which to make something new happen.

When she's alone and you're alone, however, you're both on equal footing. You're both more vulnerable, more likely to be yourself (rule #1 for dating in general, not to mention all of life). Neither of you have that safety net of friends to fall back on, and neither of you have a peanut gallery feeding your head with their opinions of what you should or shouldn't do. Your guard is down and so is hers. All this gives you the best chance of making an authentic first impression, the best chance you have of discovering whether there's enough mutual chemistry between you to merit further conversation (which is all that you can ever really ask).

More than Words

Picking up women is less about the words coming out of your mouth and more about the unspoken communications coming from your body language. Body language can make the difference between a "Yes" and a "No", between a smiling nod and a cold shoulder.

Your body language conveys how relaxed or nervous you are, how confident or insecure you are, how genuine or fake you're being. A woman can tell more from the way you hold yourself when you approach her and talk to her than she ever can from your choice of words.

Do you stand tall, shoulders back, chest out, hands at your sides, make eye contact and smile? Or do you meekly slouch up to her, shoulders sloped, chest caved in, fidgeting with your hands, looking pensive, hesitant, and anywhere but directly into her eyes? The former might get you a date. The latter may get you a humiliating laugh.

Take Her Off that Pedestal

Of course, learning the proper and improper ways to hold yourself is easy when you're at home and can practice in front of a mirror, but all that diligent effort typically falls by the wayside when you're facing a gorgeous stranger. Suddenly you forget all your dating training, and you become nothing more than a bundle of want. That want is an instant and total turn-off.

The way, then, to ensure that your body language is as inviting and attractive as possible, even when you're completely unable to recall the specific tips you've learned, is to put your attachment to achieving some result (namely: getting this girl's number) out of your mind.

Remove the expectations, the goal, the objective, the prize from your mind, and all that's left is you and her.

If approaching her holds no more weight to you than ordering a cheeseburger, if you're just going about your day and just happen to be taking a moment out to strike up a conversation with a stranger, you're much more likely to behave naturally, an attractive demeanor by any measure.

One major reason why so many men fail in their efforts to win the interest of a woman is that they try too hard. They pay an inappropriate compliment. They ask an irrelevant question. They ramble on endlessly with some unsolicited information about themselves. None of this would happen if the guy didn't care so much whether or not the woman liked him, whether or not his pick-up attempts were "good enough".

So take it down a notch. Don't make it seem like your whole life depends on winning her approval. Don't be a dog, be a man. If she's interested, she's interested. If not, so what? You're no worse off than if you had never approached her in first place. At least you gave it a shot, and for that, whether successful or not, you should feel good about yourself. Better than if you'd done nothing at all.

The Most-Effective Pick-Up Line Ever

You ready? You may be surprised...

It's "Hi".

That's all. Nothing fancy. Nothing contrived, nothing practiced and artificial. Just an opening.

Then you can introduce yourself. Hopefully she'll return the courtesy. If not, you've got a pretty clear indication that you're not going to get anywhere with her. If she does tell you her name, then Congratulations! you've just broken the ice.

From there you can take it anywhere. The top 3 contenders are:
1. Make an observation about your environment
2. Ask a (complimentary) question about something she's wearing, carrying, or some other part of her appearance.
3. Ask her for a woman's perspective on a question you've been pondering.

Dating and Personality

2009-03-07T02:02:00.000-08:00

It's a very common attribute amongst people. People judge others by their looks all the time. However, when hoping to find someone you can spend the rest of your life with then it is important to silence this trait and be able to look for the more important attributes of someone's personality.

Unfortunately, everybody does it. At some point everyone should take a step back and realize that subconsciously we all do it, we all have the tendency to be superficial.

Many believe that men do it more often than women when looking for a relationship. Nevertheless, this behavior can be de-constructive when it comes to meeting a woman for a relationship. Every person likes to be appreciated for who they are, not what they look like and this is something that stands as an obstacle for every relationship. Even people who have great physical beauty don't want to be judged based on that beauty.

The widespread idea is that it is possible to like a person for their physical beauty first and then start to like a person for who they are once you get to know them. Once you find the character of the person agreeable you will start liking the person for who they are. When it comes to dating many men are like that. They look at physical beauty only and don't try to look deeper than that.

Men find themselves entangled in long but problematic relationships that cause a lot of hardship just because the woman they are dating is beautiful from the outside but doesn't have the personality traits that match.

The shallowness of some men and the notion that looks are the only determinant to happiness has influenced how women think. Some women are convinced that men only interested in looks and this idea makes them feel insecure about who they are and how they approach relationships and life in general. This comes into play when women get older and less youthful in appearance.

Society and how men think especially has made women terribly self conscious about their looks. When considering what you truly believe is important in a woman. If looks is top on your list it will surely lead to a very dissatisfying experience for you, and your woman.

Another difference regarding how men and women are perceived by the opposite sex is that a man is considered more distinguished looking when his hair takes on the salt and pepper look, whereas women merely look old. Wrinkles on a man are no big deal, but for women the first sign of a wrinkle is cause to consider botox treatment or other cosmetic surgery.
A good example on how this unfortunate social mechanism functions is that many people need to see a person or the other persons picture before they actually get to know them first. Nevertheless, a decision based largely on looks is more suitable for a shallow meaningless relationship rather than anything else.

Both men and women need to learn how to appreciate other people, prospective mates for who they are and not the way they look. In the authors opinion it is imperative for someone who is looking for a relationship, to be able to externalize their inner beauty. An attractive personality is much more important than an attractive shell.

How to Get to Know Your Date

2009-03-04T02:24:00.000-08:00

The notion of dating has become embedded in our culture. Two people meet they go on a date and hopefully it' a match. The problem is that most people she dating as a shallow way of getting to know someone. Nevertheless, its not necessarily the case. Two people can create a meaningful relationship if they can manage to get to know one another the right way.

Getting to know that special man or woman is something that will happen once you spend enough time with him or her. During that time it is important that you are able to communicate properly and in a way that will allow the relationship to flourish. Communication ought to be both verbal and physical.

In order for communication to evolve properly one must always keep an open mind. Don't judge people based on their appearances alone and try to stay interested. Most people wont open up right away so getting to know someone could take some time, a few dates. Its imperative to keep your relationship moving forward, you are going to have to find out as much as you can about him or her.

Getting to know someone comes with patience. Once that happens, and you are able to keep an open mind and not judge people, romance will follow. When it comes to getting to know someone communication plays a very significant role. In order to communicate properly you have to listen first. Listen to what the other person has to say and let them open up. Listen carefully and try to understand. When you start understanding that's when communication will flourish. You need to be in the position to start conversations.

There is really no better way to get to know your date than through the interaction you'll have with them during a conversation. These traits come into play more when you are dating someone from a different cultural background for example a Greek woman or man.

What you learn through all communication will serve as a great starting point that will enable you to start understanding better. Being good at understanding the other person and their needs comes from being able to listen first. Of course the same goes with your date as well. Whether you date is a man or a woman they need to be able to communicate and be understanding.

Although there are many things people have in common, there are an equal number of things that they don't have in common, either. That's why being communicative and understanding is very important when entering a new relationship.

Ultimately, it all comes back to what you can learn about her for yourself. While it is helpful to get a few dating tips from your dates or significant others friends, family, and acquaintances, too much of this type of research can be confusing and irrelevant. It is important to be able for you to understand your date and allow your relationship to flourish by not being obstructive but a constructive dating communicator.

3 Steps In The Right Direction to Get Back With Ex

2009-03-01T06:18:00.000-08:00

Breaking up can be an upsetting experience. Feelings of anger and despair flow through your mind constantly for the first few days. Finally you calm down and realize that you still love this person and you don't want to be without them. Wanting to get back with ex and knowing how are two different stories. Almost 90% of failed relationships could have been saved. Follow the steps below to put yourself in the percentage that succeeded.

The first thing you need to do is reign in your feelings of wanting to constantly have contact with your ex. The first few days after a break up are filled with emotions on both sides. Your ex is upset and angry and you are just wondering what the hell happened. You have to put all this aside and realize that your ex is going to need some space. If you act to desperate you could push your ex far enough away that they won't ever come back. Give them and yourself some time to calm down and get your emotions under control.

The second step is to realize that your life does not completely revolve around your ex. Yes there is a part of you that is missing right now but that does not mean your life becomes all about how your going to get back with ex. There were things you enjoyed before you met your ex and it's time to revisit them. As time passes the fact that you are doing well and moving on with your life will reach your ex's ears. It's this type of interest and confidence that you exude that will make you more attractive to your ex. Constantly apologizing and begging for you ex to take you back will just put you both in a awkward situation. The will have all the power over you at the at point and eventually you will resent them for it.

Finally you can open the lines of communication with your ex slowly. Let them know that you would like to get together and casually talk about some of the things you have been thinking about. Let them know there is no pressure and you don't want anything else from them except to talk. This will go along way in earning your ex's trust. You have to remember that they fell in love with you at one point. You just have to get them back to that place. These are just a few steps used to get back with ex.

Dating Someone Who Is Overweight

2009-02-26T01:01:00.000-08:00

Have you been dating someone who is one of the nicest people that you have ever known and who you really enjoy being around? If so, you should consider yourself lucky. When you think about what you would change about the person do you always think about their weight? More people than ever before are overweight, which means that all of us have the chance of falling for someone who is overweight. Is being overweight a deal breaker for you?

If you always think about their weight you need to get to the bottom of it. You need to remember that what a person looks like is not all that there is to them. If you have fun with the person and they treat you well, you need to learn to move past the weight issue if this is purely a vanity thing. Most people find that when they are really in love some with someone that it is easy to look past their physical issues and just love them for who they are.

On the flip side of the coin, you may be worried about the health of the person that you are dating. While you should not be wrapped up in what the person you are dating looks like, you may have a reason to worry about their health if they are overweight. Do you notice that they cannot easily participate in physical activities? Do they have health problems that could be linked to their being over weight? In this instance you may have a bit of a reason to consider their weight.

If you are dating someone who is overweight you need to be careful how you approach this topic. Most people who should lose some weight don't need other people to point that out to them, but if you want to help you can be supportive. Let your love interest know that you want to start eating better and you would enjoy their support. You may also want to tell them that you want to start working out more and you would like them to join you in this endeavor, as well. When you make it about you, you may be able to help your love interest lose weight and get in shape. You'll not only feel better about their health, you may find that you are more attracted to them than you have been in a long time, or ever!

This is not to say that you should concentrate solely on someone's weight. You shouldn't date someone with the intention of helping them lose weight, because not everyone wants to lose weight and get in better shape. If you cannot stand the idea of dating someone who is overweight, you may be limiting your options, but you should definitely steer clear of anyone who has weight to lose.

Dating Someone Who Morphs Into A Different Person

2009-02-23T02:02:00.000-08:00

Have you ever dated someone who seemed like they would morph into a different person in every circumstance that they were in? We all do this to a certain extent, but there are some people who become someone entirely different when they are put into different situations and this can be a bit confusing or off putting for the more normal person. People who change in this way are often called chameleons because they are able to change their colors depending on the surroundings.

Dating someone who is like this can be complicated especially if you have always known them in one setting. You fell for the person based on what you saw in this one setting and you have always enjoyed their company. Now you go somewhere new with them and suddenly they seem like someone else entirely. How do you respond?

It can be a bit perplexing and you may just want to sit back and watch. You may realize that your date is just trying to fit in and after they warm up you should wait and see if they come around a bit and start acting more like the person you have gotten to know. You should pay particular attention to how they act toward you. Most of the time, if someone acts a little bit different in another setting they still treat you the same, you can look past it. If the person not only behaves differently but treats you differently, this can be a little bit more difficult to move past.

If they treat you differently you should talk to them about how they change from setting to setting. You may want to let the first time just pass and see if it happens again. If you find that your date is truly a chameleon then it is time to sit down and talk to them. Let them know that how they change from one situation to the next is uncomfortable for you.

Talk about why they do this and if you can help them be more comfortable with who they really are. You may need to ask, as politely as possible, if the person you know is the real them or if they have been putting on airs for you, too. Let them know that you enjoy their company but you find it disturbing how much they change from situation to situation.

Many chameleons don't realize that they do this and they may actually be surprised by the discussion. Others realize that they do it and they have no shame over it. You need to decide for yourself if you can keep dating someone who is so unpredictable in social settings. Many people find that they just cannot deal with the unknown every time they step out of the house with such a person.

Dating Someone Who Is On Medication

2009-02-20T01:00:00.000-08:00

The term "mentally ill" is being used more and more and in some instances it is a bit misleading. Many people assume that everyone who is on medication for any mental issues is "mentally ill" but this is probably not a fair statement.

If you do know that the person you are dating is taking medications, you should embrace it and help the person be the best that they can be. You should also try to understand the mental issues that the medications are addressing.

You should know that a good percentage of people are on some sort of medication or have sought treatment for what could be considered a "mental illness" by some. You need to remember that dating someone who is on some sort of medication is not rare and it doesn't have to be something that you are afraid of. You just need to be very open about it and decide for yourself who you can date and who you cannot.

You may have been dating someone for awhile and recently they just don't you that they are on medication for depression and you are wondering if you should be dating someone who is mentally ill, the fact of the matter is that they probably aren't really ill, in fact someone who takes medication is ahead of the game because they are preventing mental illness from taking hold.

For instance, if the person you are dating is taking medications for depression that is one thing, but if they are taking medications for bipolar disorder it is something different. You should know what your love interest is being medicated for and why. This can help you understand one another better and help you not judge them for something you don't understand.

If you are dating someone who really needs medications for a mental illness you should be prepared for the fact that a lot of people try to go off of their medications on their own. This can cause big changes in moods and personalities and you need to decide for yourself if you can continue to be around someone who will not stay on their medication. This is why it is important for you to understand what your friend is suffering from and how you can help.

The stigma attached to mental illness is not what it once was. Now people are encouraged to get the help that they need so they can be the people they were meant to be aside from depression or other issues. If you find that someone that you like is being treated for a mental illness, don't write them off just based on this. Instead, slow down and consider how you can help and how much you like the person!

Signs Of Telling If A Relationship Ends

2009-02-17T01:02:00.000-08:00

When you are in a relationship with someone and you start to get some bad signals or signs or even bad vibes, it would be for the best for all involved to back out of the relationship because it's probably up in smoke. Long distance relationships usually suffer the most.

In cases like these, the relationship is harder to keep going because there are so many miles and so many different things that can come into play. These people might meet someone there where they live, or one of these persons would have to move to the area where the other person is living, and they might not want to leave because of their family or friends.

In most cases, you will end up getting some signals or signs that, if you really think or look at them, are trying to tell you that this relationship is over. When this happens, always try to let the person you are breaking up with down easy. Don't be mean or nasty to them. Just tell them that this isn't going to work and that you would like to stay friends. This is the best way and the nicest way to end a relationship.

This way will only work like this if the couple that is breaking up live far apart and it isn't that easy to go and see this person face to face to tell them that it's over. Some people will think that this is the chicken's way out, but it is the only way that it can be done. If you are a couple that live in the same town, then you will have to go face to face to tell that person that you don't think that it is working and be honest about the reason or reasons why.

If more people would listen to their own vibes about people in general, you would be surprised as the number of feelings about this person might be right. Some people can tell what a person is like by the vibes that they will receive from this person. You can even sometimes tell by a person's mood if you will like them as a person. Sometimes a person can be loving one minute and change right in front of your eyes to someone that you might even like to be near. This can happen in more cases than you will ever know.

Dating Someone Who Likes Animals

2009-02-14T01:20:00.000-08:00

Are you one of those people who doesn't like animals or is just indifferent toward them? Many people feel this way and it seems like people who don't appreciate animals often find themselves dating or even in a serious relationship with someone who is a true animal lover. How do you reconcile these differences and build or maintain a strong relationship when you have such a difference in opinion where animals are concerned?

If you have never been in a relationship where there is a difference like this, liking animals and not, may not seem like a big deal to you. When you either love animals or don't and the person that you are dating feels differently you may find that it is a bigger deal than you would have ever imagined, especially if the animal lover of the two of you already has animals and has a desire to have even more.

So, how do you deal with this? If you are the person who does not like animals you should express your fear or dislike of them to your partner. Let them know that you value your relationship but you need to move slowly with the animals. Tell them to keep their animals in your presence but perhaps not on you or right next to you. This will allow you to warm up to the idea of animals being around you so that you can hopefully accept the part of your partner's life that is important to them while staying comfortable yourself.

If you are the person with the animals be sure to move slowly and not force your mate to like your animals. If you take it slowly you may find that they actually warm up to your animals and seek them out. This can be especially true if your mate just doesn't know much about the animals or if they have had a bad experience in the past. If you allow for things to progress at a natural pace you will likely find that all of you, including your animals, can learn to co-exist.

Animals are a big part of a lot of people's lives and those that love animals don't understand those that do not, yet we often end up dating one another. Just be really patient and allow for your mate to get to know your animals and for your animals to get to know them.

If everyone is willing to work at it, animal lovers and non-animals lovers can learn to co-exist nicely together. If you push it, you'll find that it backfires, so just sit back and be patient and things will likely work out.

Finding The Right Man

2009-02-11T01:51:00.000-08:00

Relationships will always be complicated. Many women simply do not know what they are looking for in a man. If you are a woman over forty, and you are looking for a new man to begin a relationship with, you must think about exactly what kind of relationship you want before you even start dating.

Men and women are very different, but most women realize that from a very young age. When it comes to getting involved in a romantic relationship, men and women seek and expect very different things. This is the reason why it seems so difficult for us to find a man that will make us happy.

Take a look at your past relationships with men. All of us tend to be creatures of habit, so it is very likely that you are just finding the same type of man over and over again. This time let it be different so you can break the cycle and find someone you are truly compatible with.

Make a list of what qualities and traits you are seeking with a man you would want to become involved with. Write down what you would expect in regards to handling finances, intimacy, faith, values, family, and anything else that is part of your life. So many women believe that men will change once they are in a committed relationship with a woman. This is rarely true and women should not expect it.

You deserve to be in a relationship with a man who will accept you for who you are. Focus on finding the right person, make a commitment to seek out men who have the qualities, characteristics, and traits that are important to you, and then make an effort to meet men who meet your criteria.

If you are involved in activities with your church or community, this is the best place to start looking for a man who will meet your expectations. You will share similar value systems and have interests in common, so there is much more of a chance that a relationship that starts out like this will endure the test of time.

So be willing to take a chance on love and find a man who will be loving and accepting of you, just the way you are.

9 Cheap but Romantic Date Ideas

2009-02-08T04:02:00.000-08:00

If you can't afford the stereotypical date of dinner out at a fancy restaurant, don't worry. There are plenty of things that you and your loved one can do on a very limited budget.

Whether you're taking out someone special, rekindling the romance with your spouse or planning a night out with another couple, use these ideas for inspiration.

1. A picnic in the park. Few dates are as romantic as the simple picnic in the park. Pack a basket with some strawberries, homemade sandwiches and sparkling cider or wine. Even the most humble meal can be made special by eating it outdoors.

2. Explore your home town. Go to the local visitor's bureau and see what free events are coming to your area, or what hidden gems are around town that you may have forgotten about. Pretend you're a visitor to your city and see it through new eyes. You'll probably find a lot of free, or nearly free, activities that you never knew existed in your area. For example, many towns have walking maps of historical homes and landmarks.

3. A walk on the beach. If you have an ocean nearby, be sure to take advantage of the romantic potential of a walk on the beach. Time your walk for early morning or late evening, just as the sun is making its most dramatic show in the sky. You can also visit a beach at night and enjoy a moonlit stroll.

4. Make your own game night. Raid the dollar store for a variety of different game pieces and create your own game. Mix up pieces from different games, like cards, dice, game pieces, etc. Make up rules and then write them down so you can play again in the future.

5. A bookstore visit. Go to a bookstore and read each other your favorite books from childhood. Pick out a travel book from a place you'd like to visit and share your dream vacation. There are so many things you can explore together at a boo store that you may want to go back more than once.

6. Explore local arts. Local music shows, art festivals and poetry readings are great ways to support the local arts and have a cheap date at the same time. Look through the Friday newspaper to get in touch with what's going on over the weekend.

7. Take a tour. if you have a local food or beverage factory, you have a potential frugal date destination. Call the factory to see if they offer tours and book a date.

8. Travel games. Take a drive without knowing where you'll end up. Make up a list of directions that you'll follow before you leave your house. For example, "turn left at the first yellow house" or "go three miles past the first red sign."

9. Volunteer. This date idea is perfect if you and your significant other care about protecting the world and helping others. Decide on your favorite cause as a couple and then look for opportunities to make a difference. Local soup kitchens, senior care facilities and environmental groups are always looking for volunteers.

Getting Your Boyfriend Back

2009-02-05T04:45:00.000-08:00

Break-ups can definitely be devastating. If you've just been through one, you may be left feeling disillusioned and confused. The initial shock is difficult to get through, but this is also a very critical time if you are holding out any hope of getting back together with your boyfriend.

Once the break-up has taken place, the first thing you need to do is to assess the situation and decide if there is a chance to win your boyfriend's heart back. If the break-up happened due to infidelity, it will be much more difficult for reconciliation, forgiveness, and healing. The process will be slow and he will have to learn to trust you again.

Depending on the circumstances surrounding the separation, the initial shock can take such a toll on your emotions that it can often cause a person to do and say things that they will deeply regret later on. Regardless of the stress you may be under, it is imperative that you take control of the situation and especially of your own actions. Remember, if you want the opportunity to win your boyfriend back, now is not the time for fits of rage, stalking, or any other actions that can be held against you later.

If the cause for the break-up was not due to unfaithfulness, then it is important to keep in mind the fact that he originally dated you for a reason and once he is away from you, chances are good that he will realize what he is missing. That is why it is critical to remain in control during this initial period.

During the first stages after a relationship ends, the man carries around his mental list of reasons why the separation was necessary. He continues to tell himself, especially when he starts feeling lonely, that this was the right thing to do. During this time frame, if you reinforce his reasoning by acting out in anger against him, this will only serve to solidify his decision.

Instead, take this cooling off period as an opportunity to work on yourself. Keep your self-esteem high by joining the gym, getting your hair done, socializing with friends. It is when you remain secure and calm that he will have the opportunity to remember the good times with you and begin to miss you.

By remaining calm and offering an opportunity to talk, you are showing him that you are not only self assured, but mature and able to handle even highly emotional and traumatic events. Believe it or not, this will be highly attractive to your ex boyfriend.

If he hasn't called and it's been over two weeks since the break-up, it's a good idea to keep communication open by emailing or calling to ask how he is doing. Nothing too serious, just let him know that you are thinking of him and let it go. If you feel a positive reaction from him, it is fine to ask him if you two can talk over lunch or at a park.

Most women make the deadly mistake of immediately destroying his belongings, bad-mouthing him to friends, hitting the bars, or dating someone else in an effort to make him jealous. All terrible choices that can ruin any chance for reconciliation. If you want to get back together with your boyfriend, give him that cooling off period and then offer him the open door to get back together. Be ready and willing to discuss the problems that led to the break-up. All of these things will get you back on the path to a happy, healthy relationship.

How To Win Your Ex Back

2009-02-02T02:39:00.000-08:00

On a normal day, you would have woken up and get ready to go to work. But today, you just don't feel like waking up. Everything around you seems so gloomy. Because, yesterday, Jane just said, "Let's just be friends."

Yes, a break up with your boyfriend or girlfriend can be very devastating and this is understandable. It is just like you lose a very important part of yourself. And most probably, deep inside you heart, you really wish you can win your ex back, but is not really sure if you can succeed.

The first step towards winning your ex back is to have "Hope". Yes, hope is very important. Without that little bit of "Hope", you will probably not even try. You probably will not even attempt to contact your ex.

So, how to win your ex back? What are the steps I should take?

Well, perhaps the first task is to heal your emotions. Yes, you are emotionally devastated after a break up, at least for a few days. But after those few days, it is time for you to get positive again. Ultimately, youcan't win your ex back by being pessimistic. People like to stay together with optimistic and positive people. Being pessimistic, needy or desperatewill only drive your ex further away.

Well, winning your ex back is definitely not an easy task, depending on your circumstances. But it is definitely not impossible either. You might not believe it, but it seems that there are many people breaking up everyday. The good news is there are also a lot of couples patching up after their break up.

The second step you will want totake is to avoid making mistakes. The fact is people tend to make mistakes when trying to win their ex back. And those mistakes are more common than you would believe.

Some common mistakes includecalling your ex over and over again, trying to argue with your ex over the break up, trying to professyour undying love etc. So, why are these actions considered mistakes? Well, if you take the time to ponder about it, you will realize that these mistakes are committed out of desperation.

Some common mistakes include calling your ex over and over again, trying to argue with your ex over the break up, trying to profess your undying love etc. So, why are these actions considered mistakes? Well, if you take the time to ponder about it, you will realize that these mistakes are committed out of desperation.

Confident Body Language Makes and Dating Success

2009-01-30T02:11:00.000-08:00

Pay attention to how you walk. The way you walk, whether it is down the street or to you're your car or when you are approaching a woman tells the world so much about you that you may as well hang a sign around your next. A slow, shuffled walk with the head hanging is a huge indication that you don't feel like much of a man. A strong and confident stride indicates that you feel pretty powerful in your own right. Using your natural body language to help you on your journey of discovering women can actually be a truly transforming experience.

When you opt to walk up to a woman, whether you are interested or not plays a role in how you present yourself. When you aren't interested you aren't feeling any type of threat and so you have a more confident stride. When you are interested and are working up the nerve to express a desire or ask for her time next Friday night, there is a fear of rejection and thus the body language changes and you hold your entire posture weaker and less fiercely. So it would ne a logical next step to believe that if we remove the threat of being turned down as a fearful event, then we may very well present ourselves with much more confidence.

Confidence is an important characteristic to landing a confident and healthy woman. You can't land what you can't portray. This means that when you decide to approach women, you have to put yourself back on a level playing field. If she turns you down, can you see that as a good thing? If she isn't interested, she simply saved you some time. She also saved you some heartache in the long run. Why chase a woman who isn't interested in you? It's not very self respecting.

If you want to really focus on your posture, practice talking to women that you feel are out of your league. You don't have to ask them out or even flirt with them. Just initiate any conversation to get things rolling. She might think you're hitting on her but if you know that you're not, just work on your entire posturing while you're talking to her. Be genuine and sincere, but remember that you're not interested. This technique has backfired a few times and the guy practicing has ended up walking away with a date from a practice run.

Practicing takes the mystery out of beautiful women. If you can hold a conversation, remain genuine, and hold your posture the entire time you talk to a beautiful woman, the next time you want to ask a woman out you aren't going to be nearly as intimidated. This sort of practice run can help to boost your confidence and give you a footing in the idea that women, nor men, do not hold all the power in the beginning of the relationship. Just as you want to ask her out because you are interested in her, she probably wants to hold your attention just as well.

Men's Dating Tips To Attract Beautiful Women

2009-01-27T01:08:00.000-08:00

It has gotten a little confusing for guys as of late to figure out exactly what women like and don't like. They are independent creatures and yet when dating they seem to have a different range of expectations. Women are independent. They don't like to be "taken care of" the way you take care of an infant child. They like to think for themselves, they like to be able to make their own decisions, and they like to be accomplished and capable. But there is still something to be said for being treated with respect and honoring the fact that they are also very amazing and intricate creatures.

Treat your woman like charmed angel with power while you are on your date. You never want to assume to take away a woman's power. Pull out her chair for her while still thinking she can move the world. Grab a table or find her a seat while still knowing that she has the ability to handle everything. Simple action of caring are different actions of care taking. Care taking implies that they can't or are not as good as a guy at taking care of themselves and the world around them. Actions of caring are sweet and yet simple, subtle and yet gentlemanly.

Make sure that you are timely. A lot of women won't wait more than fifteen minutes past the agreed upon time before splitting and so it is vital that you respect her time and get there on time. Don't make her wait as a test to see if she really wants to go out with you. She already said she did so why take it any further and cause unnecessary friction. Always check to see that she is comfortable with the location of the table. A small gesture like this can mean you date might last longer. If she is in a drafty location and freezes through the entire date, she isn't going to want to longer over drinks or coffee at the end of the evening.

No matter what happened during your day, you need to stay relaxed and calm. You are just there to have a good time and to be part of her environment for awhile. If you keep thinking that a little nookie would really help to calm you down and that she is just the perfect one for the job, you're going to be on edge and that's going to come across to her. Maintain a good attitude about everything that happens throughout the night and you'll have a much better night.

Pay the bill. Women are independent and they might insist on paying their share. If she insists more than twice, then let her do so, but otherwise give her the chance to be taken out and let her know that you have got this one. You might not be able to afford to pay every time. The first one is an important one and there is no harm in winking that she can split it with you next time.

Just be yourself and relax throughout the evening. Loosen up to have some fun in the company of a woman and let the night lead wherever it may.

Creative Romance in Dating Relationship

2009-01-24T04:02:00.000-08:00

Creative introductions can be really awesome ways to meet women and stand out form the crowd. When you are competing for a woman's attention, sometimes going a little toward the humorous and creative can open up doors that you never thought possible. Of course, ever guy has a different definition of what is truly creative and what falls to the wayside. When you tap into your creative juices, think about how it would feel for a woman to be exposed to your particular idea, and reflect upon whether or not it is still rather genuine and

Being creative might mean introducing yourself with a specially made fake ID or creating a whirlwind of mystery around who you are and what you're all about. Women do appreciate a little creativity, and when you can stand apart from other guys with your sense of humor, it works really well with the right woman.

Maintaining creativity all throughout a romance is important. Creative relationships not only tend to last but are a lot of fun for the parties involved. When you try new ideas and go for new theories when it comes to expressing yourself to a woman, in almost any circumstance you are going to be rewarded not only for the initial effort, but for thought as well. And when a woman is busy rewarding for creative play, she is most definitely willing to go for a little more creative expression herself.

Why don't guys get really creative and offer some women a whole new perspective of who they are and the dating game? Most guys will admit that they are afraid of making themselves look foolish. Looking foolish is something that is only in the eye of the beholder. Looking foolish can also come from holding back and resisting the full participation in any idea. If you are trying to meet a girl who spends every Saturday afternoon at the ice rink and you decide to slap on some skates and try an ultra fresh performance for her, the only way you are going to look foolish is if you hold back. Other than that you can completely expect to be seen as sweet, romantic, and creative.

When you are working toward being really expressive and interesting, challenge yourself to reach new levels of personal involvement. It can be creatively expressive to order up a singing telegram, but it is also very easy to write out a check. It is much more involved to show up in a rented costume and do the singing yourself. Of course, your level of comfort probably will determine how hands on you decide to get. Creative interaction is in part about stretching your boundaries and in part about having a good experience.

It can be very difficult to read up on how to be creative because it is such a personal idea. Creativity means different things to different people. When you are trying to be creative you are also trying to use part of your brain that you either exercise regularly or hardly ever exercise at all depending on your personality. Some ideas that strike some women as creative and others as just thoughtful can vary as well. If you are sure that you are looking to create some romance in the picture, whether you have just met, barely met at all, or have been together for twenty years, the trick is to find out what she believes is romantically creative and then run with offshoots of what she gives you. Sometimes you have to ask the question outright and sometimes you can figure it out if you are just paying attention.

When you are working toward being really expressive and interesting, challenge yourself to reach new levels of personal involvement. It can be creatively expressive to order up a singing telegram, but it is also very easy to write out a check. It is much more involved to show up in a rented costume and do the singing yourself. Of course, your level of comfort probably will determine how hands on you decide to get. Creative interaction is in part about stretching your boundaries and in part about having a good experience.

Challenging yourself to come up with new ways of expressing interest in a woman can actually be a lot of fun. You can hit websites, you can make lists, and of course, you can experiment and get her direct opinion. When she is able to tell you what she believes is creative and offers you her own ideas, you know you are developing one of the most important aspect of creating a strong and meaningful relationship fun.

Have fun getting creative, whether it is to meet someone special or to keep someone special. Getting down and pulling out all the stops can be quite a trip for everyone. Don't be afraid to get silly and don't be afraid that she thinks you will be silly. If she can't appreciate how far you're willing to go then perhaps you need to be seeking out a different type of

Social Life Improves Your Dating Success

2009-01-21T03:58:00.000-08:00

While men and women differ on this particular topic, a social life is important to both genders. Ironically, more and more men and women both report having great difficulty in the once simple prospect of making friends. Remember how easy it was when we were all young? You stood next to someone on the playground or in line and just asked them if they wanted to be your friend. Once they agreed you were off and running and playing together.

The adult world makes it a little more difficult. Many people report that the majority of the friends either come from their work environment or a hobby interest. If work friends aren't happening and you don't have a hobby that is ready to lift off the ground and boost your social life, then you have to go out, meet people, and be ready to exchange information so that you can contact them again.

Workshops and seminars are a really good place to network and sometimes you can make one good friend in these environments, but making friends means going out and finding places where you can hang out, talk to a wide variety of people and going on about your business once you have collected their name and number or email address.

Regardless of their gender, don't call a brand new friend the next day. Give it a few days to a week before you go charging off to ask them to meet you for coffee or drinks or whatever. There is no need to make up an excuse, just simply tell them that you really enjoyed their company and that you had some free time that you'd like to spend getting together and hanging out. Make it easy for them and they will usually respond with a positive response.

You do have to take a significant amount of time to develop real friendships. You really can't run out and find a new best friend like you could when you were eight. Instead you have to start showing up to a lot of places, spending time with people individually. Going fishing or sailing or hiking or whatever floats everyone's proverbial boat creates a good adventure to get to know two or three new friends at once.

The hardest part about making new friends is realizing that you may have some significant differences. You might need to really take a poll of your inner feelings about some issues, especially those that center around religion or politics. After all, nobody is going to meet all of your criteria. You may find that you like one person more than you originally planned and you might find the person you thought was going to be the greatest friend in the world isn't going to make any type of friend for you. Relax, be as accepting as possible, and then let the new relationships in your life take on a course of their own. Present yourself as authentically as possible and never be afraid to be who you are.

When you start hanging out with any one particular friend over a period of a few weeks with more regularity, you might decide that you want to meet their friends. This is a simple method of expending your circle and deciding that the person your new friend is talking about sounds like someone worth meeting, and expressing that thought. In most cases, the next time the gang is all heading out to grab a bite to eat together that you will be invited along. Let things unfold naturally and over the period of a few months you will go from no friends to a strong circle of growing friends. And friendships that are really true and strong are worth more than you could ever calculate.

British Women Seek Younger Men

2008-08-26T02:41:00.000-07:00

Copyright 2007 by United Press International
A British survey suggests that an increasing number of women over the age of 45 are seeking relationships with younger men.

The survey of 1,200 adults conducted by London-based Parship dating service found that the number of older women seeking younger men rose by 20 percent over the course of one year to nearly one in 10, The Daily Mail reported Monday. Of that number, 3 percent said they are seeking men more than 10 years their junior.

The survey found that approximately two-thirds of women seeking younger men live in rural areas and many of them use Internet dating sites to find companionship.

For their part, younger men aren't entirely adverse to being pursued by older women, the survey found. Five percent of men between 25 and 35 years of age said they are seeking relationships with older women and 47 percent of male respondents said age has little to do with love.

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Online Dating - Post Divorce Therapy

2008-08-21T07:20:00.000-07:00

www.stuff.co.nz

"Jane" needed post-divorce love therapy. She got it at online dating websites.

Dating therapy? I'm sure all of you fellow divorcees know what I'm talking about.

However, for those still wondering, let me explain how my online-dating therapy worked, and perhaps my crazy adventures may remind you of your own healing journeys.

Like many freshly separated people, I was one of the walking wounded, with the self-esteem of a flea. I was encouraged to try online dating by a girlfriend who regularly had enormous bunches of roses, chocolates, lingerie and perfume delivered to her door by romantic suitors from all over the world.

All right, she's a gorgeous, voluptuous blonde, and I'm, well, not. But I needed to "get back into the game", or so I thought.

After a string of disappointing dates who looked very little like their profile photos, I decided to use online dating to expand my horizons and experiment in unknown territory. I began as "insecure and desperate", progressed through "flirtatious tease", "potential sugar-baby", "seductive Mrs Robinson", "mischievous prankster" to "serious seeker". Eventually I settled on "happy single".

The first place I tried was www.findsomeone.co.nz, a perfectly good site for internet virgins and serious seekers if you create the right profile.

In my photo, I was wearing a little red dress. Unfortunately, this attracted the wrong kind of attention, and one man even contacted me saying that he was "having a lot of fun manipulating my photo" and would I "give him permission to publish it on his website?"

I promptly took that photo off my profile, and subsequently received fewer messages. On the whole however, findsomeone was a reasonably respectable and conservative site.

I then tried www.adultfriendfinder.com, which was more open minded and social. I didn't post a photo, but received many inquiring messages. It was on this site that I became more adventurous.

After receiving a few messages from much younger men, I decided that I would date a lad Mrs Robinson-style.

In my previous relationships, and my marriage, I had been a sexually submissive woman, and I theorised that perhaps with a younger partner I could unleash a more dominant side.

Unfortunately, my young date had a nervous laugh and I found myself not wanting to offend his lack of experience by saying, "do it like this" or "do that". Turns out I prefer men not boys.

This led me to a man profiling himself as a "sugar daddy". Although I wasn't young enough to be his sugar baby, I began chatting with this unusually handsome and articulate chap.

I found myself being more forthright with him as I found my mojo and left my insecure self behind.

Unfortunately, he seemed to be insecure. He continuously post-poned dates until I gave up on meeting him.

Chatting online and flirting was great for my self-esteem, as I could be as bold as brass and not even have to meet anyone in person if I didn't want.

Meanwhile, the girlfriend who got me into online dating also got me into mischief. She had been dating someone for a couple of months and wanted to see where she stood. He still had his profile online and asked me to message him and see if he would date me. Don't try this.

We arranged to have coffee, but instead of me turning up at the cafe, my friend arrived instead.

You can imagine the trouble. Mind you, on a similar, but more transparent occasion, I scored a ride in a Ferrari with one of her suitors, so it wasn't all bad.

I quickly lost interest, however, when he began joking about threesomes.

After these dates, and a few other unmentionables, I was well on my way to becoming a more assertive, adventurous, self-confident woman the kind I remembered that I once was so many moons ago.

As karma would have it, I then began attracting insecure, desperate men. One of them left several messages sobbing into my telephone after I declared those dreaded words, "There's no spark for me". This was after only a few dates and not even a kiss.

Then there was the man who assumed that I wanted to hook up for sex when my profile said I was "looking for seriously good coffee". Apparently for some on nzdating, "coffee" is synonymous with sex.

Thankfully, my son fell ill and the babysitter called me home.

Yes, online dating can be great therapy for both sexes.

Thanks to my crazy adventures and fearless online experimentation, I'm now happy to be single offline.

No doubt the internet will beckon again. When that day comes, I will be in a much better position to weed out the wannabes, the desperate and those who send photos of their apparatus.

Thanks to online-dating therapy, I now know myself better, like myself better, and know what kind of man I want to meet.

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Things Your Woman Date Wants to Hear

2008-08-18T06:53:00.000-07:00

In some ways, women are a bit like Labradors (a certain breed of dogs): if you say the right things in an appropriate tone of voice, they'll do what you want.

Alternately, women also have the potential to be like caged lions, and if you piss them off and are dumb enough to stand around, they'll rip your head off. For that reason, we want to highlight some of the things that women love to hear and show you how certain phrases can consistently be used to score major points. Of course, the last thing we want to do here is spew out a list of platitudes that every guy knows women never get sick of hearing. Instead, we'd like to suggest some alternative phrases and the reasons why they are so effective.

These are not pickup lines; they're phrases meant to be used on a girl you already know. Perhaps you've been dating and you want to take things to the next level. Or maybe it's even a long-term girlfriend and you've been going through a rough patch. You might even be a bit worried that she's losing interest and is starting to look around for something else. Whatever the case, the following is meant to give you an idea of different ways to verbally press her buttons by saying things women love to hear.

Generally, the things women love to hear can be placed into four categories: compliments about her appearance, words confirming your commitment to a future together, verbal displays of territorialism, jealousy, and questions that demonstrate interest in her life.

Give compliments

The comedian Chris Rock said that women need three things: food, water and compliments. So, it's not a matter of women just wanting to hear compliments, they actually can't live without them. If they don't get them, they might even shrivel up and die. If you can periodically reel off a nice compliment and genuinely mean it, don't hesitate to do so because the benefits will come back to you in spades. However, be careful not to flood the air with empty flattery, as even the most attention-starved girl will see through your seduction strategy and call you out.

Examples of things women love to hear:
* "You look incredible." It's simple and effective. Every girl wants to hear this, particularly when she has gone to some trouble to look nice.
* "Those jeans look great on you." This is a polite (and obvious) way of telling her that she has a nice ass.

Show commitment

When you include her in your future plans, you're giving her a glimpse of the security - whether she's 19 or 36 - that she probably craves. So, say something that indicates to her that you intend to be a part of her life for a long time. Invite her to a high school reunion that's still six months away. It's enough to let her know that you envisage a future together, but not so bold as to suggest marriage and the rest of it.

We have more things women love to hear for you to memorize ...

* "I'd love to take you to (enter place of choice) this summer."
* "I'm not interested in anyone else." In any relationship, questions will inevitably arise about your commitment to her, so when she asks, say something like this to counter her doubts and reassure her that you've found all you ever needed.

Be Jealous

Being creatures of the natural world, women expect men to be the protectors in a relationship. And when we don't act like it, they get irritated and begin to look elsewhere. We have to show them how much we care, which means that we have to get territorial once in a while. We're by no means suggesting violent outbursts and paranoid accusations, but rather, some gentle prod¬ding that demonstrates that you don't want to lose her to anyone. At the end of the day, if you don't take an interest in your girl's well-being, someone else will come along with an offer to do so.

Examples of things women love to hear:

* "Where were you?" You don't have to be suspicious, just inquire about her whereabouts from time to time.
* "Who's that guy?" Ask her this in a half-joke, half serious tone and she will think it's cute that you're still evaluating the competition.

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The Dating Game: Sometimes Bad Experiences Offer Good Lessons

2008-08-13T06:14:00.000-07:00

Dating is full of ups and downs. The ups are the good dates you wish would last forever. The downs are those dates from hell — the ones you wish you could erase from your memory permanently.

Most single women have had both — like Elizabeth Aven, 30, of Oklahoma City and Brittany Meadors, 24, of Edmond.

Aven recalls one really bad date. She had gone out a few times with a guy who seemed "nice and normal.” Against her mother's advice to never invite a man to her house unless she knew him really well, she invited her date over after dinner. After a few minutes, he started getting a little too friendly.

"I just told him he was going to need to back off,” she said.

He backed off but seemed annoyed.

"About 10 minutes later, he was like, ‘OK, I've got to go,' and he just left,” she said.

Glad he was gone, Aven grabbed a snack and kicked her feet up in front of the TV.

"Maybe 45 minutes later, I get a knock at my door and it was a cop,” Aven said. "She said, ‘Hey, we got a call from someone that you were going to hurt yourself or, I don't know, try and kill yourself.'

"I was like, ‘I have no idea what you're talking about at all. I'm just sitting here just hanging out, watching TV.'”

After a few minutes of checking for evidence that Aven might be suicidal, the officer asked if she knew who might have filed the false report. She related the story of her bad date, and the two women shook their heads in wonder at the nerve of her date.

Don't go trying to change me
Meadors had dated the same guy for several years. She met him when she was 19 and working at a mall. On their first date, he was Prince Charming, she said, but soon after they became a couple, he began treating her badly.

"Not even two weeks into it, he got mad because I talked to a guy friend,” she said. "He ended up not talking to me for the rest of the evening. Stuff like that continued, and I just took it.”

When the two started dating, Meadors lived with her parents, who enforced a rule that she would be picked up and dropped off by her dates.

"He lived on the south side, and I lived in Midwest City,” she said. "He always expressed how much he hated having to drive all the way to my house to pick me up and to take me home. I thought that was really rude.”

But Meadors was so taken with her new boyfriend's good looks, she tolerated his bad manners for years. She said she always thought that he was the best she could do and that she could change him.

"You think that you're in love with them and you think that you can change people, but you can't,” she said.

Their relationship was on and off. He would break up, then ask her to come back. The final straw came on a Valentine's Day. He called her about 4:30 p.m. to see whether she wanted to meet for drinks.

"I was immediately irritated after I hung up the phone because I felt like I should have been picked up, and it just killed the mood the whole time,” she said. "It doesn't matter if I date you for a couple months or a couple years, I still want to be picked up and taken home. Especially on Valentine's Day.”

Meadors admits she made a lot of mistakes in that relationship. She knows that she mistakenly thought she could change him. She said she wasn't happy with herself and therefore, wasn't able to really be herself.

But she said she is glad to be rid of him so she can concentrate on her career and making herself happy.

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High-Tech Dating - DNA-Style!

2008-07-30T03:16:00.000-07:00

Blind dating, random dating or speed dating - that's enough beating around the bush. According to a Switzerland-based biotech organization, people need online dating to get concrete and scientific answers.

The organization in question, GenePartner has announced a DNA-matching service and is looking to partner with dating sites. GenePartner will use a $199 DNA test, the cheapest on the web, for determining compatibility of prospective partners for a long-lasting relationship.
The company has derived the algorithm after analyzing "hundreds of couples". GenePartner will use a buccal swab kit to collect the DNA sample from the saliva of its members for DNA analysis. Alternatively, a GenePartner user can enter their GenePartnerID.

GenePartner is looking forward to partner with dating services that would encourage this radical DNA matching concept. However, no widely accepted neutral body has approved of this DNA-matching algorithm. But whether the algorithm works or not, one never knows when love strikes!

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Dating Tips For Nice Guys

2008-07-27T12:58:00.000-07:00

My best friend and I, like most women, want to meet and be with a "nice man." The problem is that the nice men we have met have consistently done things that have created situations where we have no desire to continue to date them. I have quite a few "nice guy" friends who have asked me time and time again..."What are we doing wrong?" I have decided to write this for them, and for the nice guys who have ever questioned exactly what the hell was going on in our heads.

This is, in essence, a set of dating do's and don'ts for the nice guys out there. I have separated these rules into 4 sections...before the date, during the date, after the date and miscellaneous. They are generalizations and guidelines, but I would argue that they hold true for most women.

BEFORE THE DATE

DO make the first move: Yes, it sucks, but in today's world, even the most modern woman would prefer that the man make the first move. Some of us can make the first move, and occasionally do. But it's still preferable to have you do it. How do you make the first move? Walk up to us and offer to buy us a drink (if we're in a bar), ask us for a recommendation (in a bookstore/cd/movie store), or just say hi. Women do not get off on being bitchy (ok, a few do, but the majority do not) and if we're not interested we'll smile and say no thanks or walk away. Yes rejection stings, but acceptance is just as much a possibility.

DO try internet dating websites: Many women, especially busy women have gotten on board the internet dating train. Carefully construct your profile. Don't write a novel in the section where you're supposed to talk about yourself. Tell us what you do, what your passions are, and an interesting fact or two. If you have non-negotiables, this may be a good place to bring them up. My best friend and I will not date men who aren't pro-choice and pro-gay rights. Doesn't matter if he's rich, drop dead gorgeous and good in bed...without those two he's gone. There's not point in talking to women who have no interest in camping if you love it. When it asks you what you're looking for, actually create some standards. There are few things that say "desperate" to me than a man who has any any any any down his list of "potential mates."

You probably don't want to date a girl who's 3 feet tall (maybe you do, but if you do, then you probably don't want to date a woman who's 8 feet tall). If you're 18, you probably don't want to date a 60 year old woman. If you only want to date thin women, don't put that you'll date a woman with a "few extra pounds." Try to put up a picture...and find one that actually looks like you do now...not the one from 4 years ago when you had a 6 pack that has long since gone the way of the beer can. Once you're up, send winks/icebreakers to the women you find interesting. Keep it short and sweet...something to the effect of "I liked your profile, please check out mine" with a little something about you...a movie you saw recently, your thoughts on the recent political developments, whatever.

DO move it from email to aim to phone in a short period of time: Exchange two or three emails to get a feel for the person. Then move onto your instant messenger of choice. It is also acceptable to go directly to instant messenger. If things click there, take it to the phone. If they click, ask her out for COFFEE by the 3rd conversation. If you wait too long, it will never happen. Do not ask her out to dinner, go for coffee...dinner is expensive and it could be 2 hours of hell. Coffee is 20 minutes and could easily be extended into dinner should it go well.

DON'T send a novel of an email: My best friend and I recently received the exact same email from some idiot. It was long, trite and cheesy as hell. Nothing is less sincere than trying to sound like some kind of self help novel/romantic movie. Be honest about who you are. And for chrissakes, keep it short.

DON'T use bad grammar or spelling: There's such a thing as spell check. Do us a favor and use it. There was a perfectly nice guy who I stopped emailing because his emails were just plain PAINFUL to read. And it's irritating, quite frankly to see a guy write "r u into sports" instead of "do you like sports?" Take the time to write "you" instead of "u." Yes, spelling counts...not the occasional typo..we all make those. But your email to a woman is your calling card and she'll be basing her opinion on you on your email. A poorly spelled email with bad grammar says that you aren't interested in making a real effort.

DON'T keep talking to a girl if you're not interested: Yes, you don't want to hurt someone's feelings, but at what point do put yourself first?

THE DATE

DO show up on time, and well groomed: It's basic respect, but quite a few men seem to have missed that particular memo. Also, show up in a casual outfit like jeans and a shirt. This doesn't mean tight jeans with your hair greased up. Again, this might seem obvious, but many seem to have missed it.

DO talk: When we have to do all the talking, we think a guy isn't interested in us. Everyone has life experience to share...share yours. Maybe you think your life isn't all that interesting, but we don't know that you have siblings, or that you had the coolest dog ever when you were little. At the same time do let her talk. It's not cool to hog the conversation.

DO pay: It's perfectly okay not to, but it's a sign of respect. Which again argues for asking her out for coffee. Should you not click, you're only out $6 at most.

DON'T show up with a ton of gifts: A friend was recently embarrassed when a guy showed up with candy, AND flowers, AND a balloon. Can we say overkill? If you feel the need to bring over something, make it a single flower, or a bunch of simple flowers like daisies. Red roses are trite, uncomfortable and too much. A single rose is acceptable when it isn't red...go for yellow, parchment, or a funky rose. The best flower I ever got on a first date was a rose that had been died blue and dipped in silver glitter. It wasn't the best because it was a rose...it was that it was really interesting and original. Flowers are really for the 2nd date (and even then, stay away from red roses...which are for girlfriends, not dates). Balloons are only acceptable on birthdays. Candy is a kind of random gift...on Valentine's Day maybe, if she's your girlfriend. Or perhaps if you took a trip to Switzerland or Germany or something and wanted to bring back some of that exquisite chocolate. And, please God, stay away from stuffed animals.

DON'T make the offer to take us to dinner if you don't want to: The worst dinner I ever had was with a guy who I hadn't clicked with, and made the mistake of taking the offer to dinner with. It was 45 minutes of boredom. Spare us, and spare yourselves.

DON'T try to hold our hands until we give you a sign that we're interested: A sign that we'd like you to hold our hands is to put our hand on the table, slightly extended, with the palm up. Wait for this signal. Some girls aren't comfortable with PDA's.

AFTER THE DATE

DO go in for a kiss, if you think things went well: Most women are open to a good night kiss to see if there's physical chemistry. Keep it closed mouth at first, and see if she's responding. If she turns her head, bad sign. If she responds, good sign and potentially move in for an open mouth kiss.

DO drop her a phone call or email after the date: However, I mean the day after the date. Wait at least 12 to 18 hours. Again, keep it short...Had a great time, would you like to do that again? Don't drone on about how hot she is, how much you'd like to see her again, and unless you won a million dollars, don't say it was the best date ever...again it looks desperate.

DO respect her response: If she agrees to a second date, go for it. Don't make it for that night however. If she says no, then respect it...don't email her some wounded response. Keep it for your friends.

DON'T badger her: There was a guy who my best friend was going to give a second date to. Until he emailed her 4 times and texted her another 3-5 times in 24 hours. That is stalking. If she doesn't respond to your ONE email OR voicemail, wait 3 days. Still nothing, drop a one line email that says "haven't heard from you, was wondering if you got my message." If she still doesn't respond, don't continue to pursue her.

DON'T use pet names early on: I once decided to stop talking to a guy who called me princess in our first instant message conversation. I was disappointed because he seemed like a cool guy. However, the use of pet names is uncomfortable, and sends the whole desperate/cheesy message. I'm not talking about the occasional hon or darlin', both of which I use with everyone. I'm talking about "angel" "gorgeous" "princess" etc.

DON'T have the relationship talk on or just after the first date: No one wants to talk about "where we're going" after ONE date. We're not even sure if we want a second date sometimes.

MISCELLANEOUS

DON'T try to date before your current relationship is over or just after it has ended: It's not fair to you or your date if you're still in love with someone else. And if your date confesses that they're still in love with their ex, make a graceful exit. Understand that sometimes people think they're ready to date, when the truth is that they're anything but, and they need that experience to know it.

DO understand that it's entirely possible to be totally into someone before a first date and totally not into someone once you meet them: Chemistry is a tricky thing and although you may have the best chemistry ever on the phone, you may have nothing in person.

DO try something other than your normal type: I'm not saying ignore your non negotiables...I'm saying if you've only ever dated blondes, try a brunette. If you've only ever dated lawyers, why not date a banker? If your type had worked, you wouldn't be single, now would you?

DO go with your gut instincts: If your gut tells you that this isn't happening, don't take it further.

FINAL THOUGHTS

JUST WHERE DO I MEET GIRLS? The question I have gotten perhaps more frequently than any other is "so where do I meet girls?" My answer is NOT in a bar. I have yet to meet a serious relationship in a club or a bar. I strongly suggest internet dating...it has worked for many people I know (and has led to two engagements in just my friendship circle). I also suggest looking in places where people with your interests gather. Some examples...if you're into Trek...go to a Trek convention. Comics/Anime...Anime con. BDSM...join the local group. If you're into books, try bookstores. If you're into a type of music, go to see your type of bands in the local music scene...keep an eye on what girls keep showing up...approach them. And if you meet a girl at an event type thing, you then also have a handy topic to bring up to break the ice.

WHAT IF I GET REJECTED? We all get rejected. The hottest people get rejected. And as I said before...we don't live to hurt people's feelings. Most women will try to let you down easily. The bottom line is that we're all looking for the same thing and we have to sometimes kiss a lot of frogs to find our prince or princess.

WHY DO WOMEN ONLY SEEM TO LIKE ASSHOLES? It's not that we like assholes. To be honest, it's that we like a challenge. If you throw yourselves at us, you are in no way a challenge. You're too easy, in fact. I'm not saying that you should be cold and distant...I'm saying that when you make it clear to us that we can have you and have everything we want from you without question, it's not interesting. You need to have your own opinions. You need to be a person outside of our boyfriend or date. The truth is that we do want a nice guy. "Bad Boys" call us once and wait for us to call them back...they tell us that they want to do something, rather than asking us constantly...and they say things that make us want to respond.

WHY DO THEY ALWAYS WANT TO BE JUST FRIENDS? You just haven't the right girl. As I said, chemistry is weird. But be careful on whether or not you agree to be friends with her. If you desperately want to date her, the answer should be "NO." There is NO shame in saying "I don't think I want that, sorry." Don't try to be her friend, laying in wait until she's single in hopes that you'll get your shot once she gets to know you. If she wants to be your friend, that's the best you've got coming. The truth is that we're pretty sure if we can see ourselves sleeping with you or dating you by the end of the first date, second date at the latest.

We want to meet you. We want to date you. Hell, we want to marry you. But we need to meet you first and that's not going to happen if you're hiding in your office or sitting at your computer reading this. Put yourself out there...it will be worthwhile.

Good luck, and let me know how it goes!

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The Sweet Smell Of Success

2008-07-22T10:20:00.000-07:00

As that great British pop group 10cc put it in their 1977 hit: "The things we do for love, the things we do for love, like walking in the rain and the snow ..."

And brushing your teeth, it seems. Yes, a new survey has revealed that not having breath like a moose's fart means you'll have more success in luurve and life. Who knew? Who knew?

The survey, conducted by a bunch called pureprofile on behalf of dental products group Oral B, questioned 1001 people nationally and discovered that 96 per cent of Australians surveyed agreed that bad oral hygiene affected the enjoyment of kissing.

(It is unbiasedly best to report here that the survey was conducted - and this is the company's word - to celebrate the launch of the new Oral B CrossAction Pro-Health, featuring a "textured tongue-cleaner". Is this a toothbrush or a new cross-trainer? It's a hell of a mouthful, either way.)

But back to our statistics. Ninety-six per cent of you think breath that could kill a poodle at 20 paces affects the enjoyment of kissing. Fair enough. Remaining upright is always a good start for a romance but think about it, people; this means that 4 per cent - 40 or so from a 1001-strong sample - think it doesn't affect the enjoyment. Really?

It gets worse. Sixty-one per cent of respondents say they have stopped snogging someone because of "bad oral hygiene". By which they mean breath so bad you can light it to keep mozzies away. Of course, it doesn't explain how you managed not to notice this until you actually had your head halfway down their gullet. A conundrum for another time, perhaps.

Break this statistic down along gender lines and women take a civilising step up (to 70 per cent) while men - and you know who you are - plummet to a grubby 54 per cent. Logically, this means 46 per cent of men would happily swap spit with a woman whose mouth whiffs like three-week-old Queensland roadkill.

Perhaps this is the deep-seated cause of the so-called epidemic of binge drinking; with only 65 per cent of women brushing their teeth twice a day it's the only way we can get near almost one-third of womankind. Next time he's kissing you, ladies, those might not be tears of joy in his eyes.

Bad oral hygiene can also, according to the survey, affect your career. High income earners (greater than $120,000 a year) questioned believe people with bad breath are less likely to be promoted at work. They are also believed to be less disciplined and less professional.

"If you feel success is eluding you," says the Oral B press release, "one factor to consider is your oral hygiene habits."

Hmmm, seems they don't call it the sweet smell of success for nothing. So buy yourself a toothbrush that can get to those difficult-to-reach areas, make sure you massage those gums, scrub that furry tongue with a spoonful of Dettol and an old copy of The Bulletin. Do that and the world is your lobster. Success will beat a path to your door and you will have lovers throwing themselves at your feet. And they'll be conscious, too.

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Sex Swap Husband To Live With Wife As a Lesbian

2008-07-21T01:45:00.000-07:00

They do look an odd couple. Lorna's only 5ft 4in tall and her 6ft 5in partner Lucy towers over her.

But it's not just the height difference that stands out... they have an amazing story to tell.

Lucy used to be Karl Ellis - a tall, handsome father-of-three with a good job as a computer engineer.

Secretly, though, Karl was a cross-dresser who liked to wear his wife's clothes about the house. Then last October he changed his name by deed poll to Lucy Jayne.

But even that could not have prepared Lorna for the next bombshell. Barely into the new year, 27-year-old Karl told her: "I want to become a real woman."

And if that wasn't shock enough, he told her that once he has had a sex change, he wants them to stay together ...as lesbians.

"I just couldn't believe it," recalls Lorna. "This was my husband saying he wanted to be my girlfriend. All I knew is I wanted to be with him. He was my first love and I couldn't imagine life without him.

"I blamed my-self and felt a complete failure as a woman. Should I have been able to convince him that he was a real man? Could I have a lesbian relationship when I knew I was heterosexual?"

Sitting by Lorna's side in their living room in Nantwich, Cheshire, Karl - now Lucy - says: "I hope we can work it out and stay together."

"Lucy" is in a black dress - with a telltale hint of stubble, an adam's apple and a tattoo on a muscular bicep.

The couple first became good friends at school more than 10 years ago. Karl shared his taste for dressing in women's clothes with Lorna when she was just 16.

One evening in her bedroom, she slipped off her top and handed it to him. Lorna, now 23, recalls: "He slipped it on.

Giving a twirl, he asked 'How do I look?'."

Cross-dressing sessions became a regular thing. A year later, the pair went out clubbing together and ended up in a passionate embrace.

A month later, in August 2002, they got a flat together. That year Lorna, still only 17, realised she was expecting.

Jessica was born in June the following year and the next year they had another daughter, Emma.

They tied the knot at Crewe register office in August 2006 and nine months later Amy was born.

Karl continued to cross dress and one night, as he flaunted himself in her lace underwear, Lorna asked: "Do you actually want to be a woman?" Lucy - then still Karl - gazed down at the floor and replied: "Yes. I've tried to bury it, but I can't."

Lorna was horrified and yelled: "Don't you think you should have thought about this before we had the kids?"

Composing herself she asked if he wanted a sex change operation. He said he wasn't sure. Karl continued the story: "We sat down and talked about it. Then we went to the doctors to see if they could help me with Lorna's support."

Karl has to live as Lucy, a woman, for two years before a sex change operation can be considered - and in the meantime the couple are still enjoying sex as man and wife.

"It's not on a regular basis," said Lorna. "We can still enjoy sex as a husband and wife, but it is changing."

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Chile Pole Dancer Arrested

2008-07-10T22:22:00.000-07:00

Police in Chile have arrested a stripper who was attempting to remove her clothes outside the presidential palace in the capital, Santiago.

Her arrest comes three days after she performed a series of striptease dances on the Santiago underground, the metro.

Monserrat Morilles told reporters that her performances were aimed at challenging the prudishness of Chilean society and that they would continue.

Chilean media has dubbed her "La Diosa del Metro" or the Metro Goddess.

'Timid country'

Ms Morilles, 26, called her performances "happy minutes."

A professional pole dancer, she boarded the train at one station, and stripped down to skimpy underwear in time to exit at the next station.

"This is just a beginning. We are starting an idea here that will grow and be developed further," she told Reuters news agency as she was being taken into custody.

"Chile is still a pretty timid country," her manager, Gustavo Pradenas, said.

"People aren't very extroverted and we want to take aim at that and make Chile a happier country."

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News flash! Condoms protect against HPV

2008-07-05T11:50:00.000-07:00

www.salon.com
Today's New York Times reports on the most conclusive study to date regarding the correlation between condom use and decreased incidence of the human papillomavirus (HPV), a cause of genital warts and cervical cancer. The five-year study found that "consistent use of condoms protects against HPV."

The study was funded by the National Institute of Allergy and Infectious Diseases, a federal agency, and was conducted at the University of Washington at Seattle from December 2000 to June 2005. Results show that "women whose male partners used condoms every time they had sexual intercourse had less than half the rate of infection as did women whose partners used condoms less than 5 percent of the time." According to the Times, "researchers followed 82 female students ages 18 through 22 from the time they said they had their first sexual intercourse with a male partner. Every two weeks, the women electronically filed information about their daily sexual behavior and condom use to a protected website. Every four months the researchers tested the women for papillomavirus and early indications of cancer." A researcher also conducted personal interviews with the participants.

If this study is indeed "definitive," as James R. Allen, president of the American Social Health Association, who was not involved in the study, told the Times, it puts to rest concerns that condoms are only partly effective, if at all, against HPV and other sexually transmitted infections. The results also take the pressure off the recently FDA-approved HPV vaccine, which some conservatives are complaining will increase sexual promiscuity among teens.

The findings should make condom labeling more straightforward as well. In 2000 a panel of four government agencies determined that there was "inadequate information about condom use in reducing the risk of all sexually transmitted infections except for the AIDS virus and, among men, gonorrhea" and the "FDA was urged to add a warning to condom labels about the lack of protection against HPV."

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Men: Score! Women: Whoops!

2008-07-03T03:18:00.000-07:00

www.salon.com
What do you know, women still experience more regret over one-night stands than men do, according to a new study. Researchers at Durham University in the U.K. surveyed 1,743 men and women about their morning-after feelings and found that 80 percent of men and 54 percent of women reported feeling good after a hookup; men also feel more confident and sexually satisfied afterward, and are more likely to brag to friends about it.

I suppose hookup hand-wringers might argue that this study is proof that young women are hooking up and tuning out, that they're having casual sex because they think they're supposed to and not because they want to. That may, indeed, be true in some cases, but I'd sooner believe that this study illustrates the familiar stud-slut double standard. Even young women of the hookup generation -- and I am one -- aren't immune to culturally commanded sexual shame; greater permissiveness toward one-night stands doesn't necessarily make it easy for women to feel proud of their sexploits. On the same note, it's no surprise women report less sexual satisfaction from their hookups: Plenty of women don't exactly experience sexual shame as an aphrodisiac, and hookup culture doesn't emphasize female pleasure so much as it does humping like bunny rabbits.

The researchers, however, focused on biological rather than cultural explanations for the study's results. "In evolutionary terms women bear the brunt of parental care and it has been generally thought that it was to their advantage to choose their mate carefully and remain faithful to make sure that their mate had no reason to believe he was raising another man's child," said lead researcher Professor Anne Campbell. "But recently biologists have suggested that females could benefit from mating with many men -- it would increase the genetic diversity of their children and, if a high quality man would not stay with them forever, they might at least get his excellent genes for their child." I'll leave you with the study's ultimate conclusion because it gave me a good chuckle: Women have yet to catch up with this bio-logic and "adapt" to meaningless sex.

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365 days of "must-have" sex

2008-06-26T11:47:00.000-07:00

Sex every day and time to write a book about it. Two couples have risen to the challenge, writes Ralph Gardner jnr.

Let's say you and your spouse haven't had sex for so long that you can't remember the last time you did. Not the day. Not the month. Maybe not even the season. Would you look for gratification elsewhere? Would you file for divorce? Or would you turn to your mate and say: "Honey, you know, I've been thinking. Why don't we do it for the next 365 days in a row?"

That's more or less what happened to Charla and Brad Muller. And in another example of an erotic adventure supplanting married ennui, a second couple, Annie and Douglas Brown, embarked on a similar, if abbreviated journey: 101 straight days of post-nuptial sex.

Both couples document their exploits in books published this month, the latest entries in what is almost a mini-genre of books offering advice about the "sex-starved marriage". The couples, though, are hardly similar. The Mullers are Bible-studying steak-eating Republicans from North Carolina. The Browns are backpacking multi-grain New Yorkers who moved to Boulder, Colorado. The Mullers' book, 365 Nights, is rather modest and circumspect in its details. The Browns's book, Just Do It, almost makes the reader feel part of a threesome, sharing everything they used to stimulate sexual desire (it's hard to visualise and even harder to explain).

To many spouses "married sex" may sound like an oxymoron. And "married-with-children sex" may sound like that elusive antimatter. Indeed, reigniting a couple's desire for each other has fuelled an entire therapeutic industry - from Kinsey to Dr Ruth. According to a 2004 study, American Sexual Behaviour by the National Opinion Research Centre at the University of Chicago, married couples have intercourse about 66 times a year. But that number is skewed by young marrieds, as young as 18, who manage it, on average, 109 times a year.

(The Australian Study of Health and Relationships taken years ago found a slightly higher rate locally. Those who had been in heterosexual relationships for at least a year had sex on average 1.84 times a week. It also found that 23.4 per cent of men and 8.3 per cent of women would like to have had sex daily, or more often.)

Either way, those statistics put the Mullers and Browns in Olympic-record territory. That they thought a sex marathon would reinvigorate their marriages might say as much about the American penchant for exercise and goal-setting as it does about the state of romance.

But the couples may also be on to something. "There's a strong relationship between rating your marriage as happy, and frequency of intercourse," said Tom Smith, who conducted the American Sexual Behaviour study. "What we can't tell you is what the causal relationship is between the two. We don't know whether people who are happy in their marriage have sex more, or whether people who have sex more become happy in their marriages, or a combination of those two."

Do these couples provide any answers? Did sex every night make them happier in their marriages and in life? Charla apparently had no intention of writing about "the gift", as she euphemistically refers to it.

She was simply a homemaker and marketing consultant, who, in 2006, wanted to give her husband a special 40th birthday present. "This is something no one else would give him," she said. "It didn't cost a lot of money. It was highly memorable. It met all the criteria for a really great gift."

Brad was less than fully enthusiastic, mostly because, he says, his wife often has big ideas and poor follow-through. After all, she hadn't been especially generous in that department since they'd had their two children. He paid closer attention when he realised she was serious.

The book idea came up serendipitously. Charla had lunch with a friend, Betsy Thorpe, a former book editor and her eventual collaborator. She saw the stuff of literature in the couple's nightly trysts (the women met three-quarters of the way through the Mullers' annus mirabilis).

While 365 Nights was written from the women's perspective, Just Do It was written by the man, Douglas Brown, a 42-year-old reporter at The Denver Post. Yet the change in gender doesn't seem to affect the point of view, perhaps because Doug comes across as a sensitive male, and because the sexual marathon in 2006 was his wife's idea, a way to banish suburban boredom after they moved to Boulder two years earlier from the East Coast.

"I thought we don't have anything else going on," Annie said. "It might kick-start our marriage."

They changed venues frequently - a cabin on an ashram, a yurt in the Colorado Rockies, and in a hotel room in Las Vegas. "That's why we scheduled all these little trips," Annie said. "We knew it had the potential of getting monotonous." And were it not for her competitive zeal, their streak might have died well short of 100 days. Annie even forced her husband to have sex during a bout of vertigo. "I'm not a quitter," she said. "The night he had vertigo, I said, 'I'm sorry, guy, but you've got to keep going."'

Doug said in an interview that on their 101st day, he felt "sort of like you had some long-forgotten appointment to hear some tax attorney talk about estate planning". After that, he said, "I think we didn't do it for a month."

The Mullers, or at least Charla, hit a wall somewhere around the 10th month. In her book, she describes the gift then as "my stupid idea" and "a hidden cross to bear". But they say they dropped out only a few days a month, mostly because of Brad's business travel. They averaged 26 to 28 times a month.

"The spirit of the gift was not to keep score," Charla said. "When he was travelling, we tried to make up for it, but it wasn't mandatory."

The women are regarded with admiration, if not always envy, by their girlfriends. "My first reaction was 'please don't tell my husband'," said Sydney Coffin, a friend of Charla's.

Annie Brown is now viewed as a de facto sex therapist by her peers. Her adventure even inspired her friend Diane Elliston to turn off the television in the bedroom. The Browns had draped tasteful fabric over theirs.

"We did it every day for three days in a row," Elliston said.

Approaching sex as a marathon, with its own version of Heartbreak Hill, may not be the solution for every stagnating marriage. Lois Braverman, the president of the Ackerman Institute for the Family, cautioned against couples trying to keep up with the Mullers and Browns. "Some couples are totally satisfied with being sexual one night a week, some twice, some twice a month," she said. "There's no number of times that's right."

Shoshana Bulow, a psychotherapist and sex therapist in Manhattan, pointed out that sex is a lot more complicated than frequency. "There's all sorts of reasons people lose interest in sex with their partner - disappointments, life cycles, financial issues," she said. "Just having it isn't going to resolve those."

Nonetheless, sex every day seems to have worked for the Mullers and Browns. Charla Muller and Annie Brown both talk about how mandated physical intimacy created more emotional intimacy. "It required a daily kindness and forgiveness, and not being cranky or snarky, that I don't think either of us had experienced before," Charla said.

Annie said that she and her husband reached a place in their relationship that they have seldom approached since. "It was just this intense closeness," she said. "We were so aware of wherever the other person was mentally and emotionally and physically."

Today, the Browns report they have sex approximately six times a month, or double their frequency before their adventure. The Mullers decline to discuss their habits, except to say that they fall well within the national average. And, Brad said, the sex is better. "It made it much easier to be open to the idea, more spontaneous," he said, "so you don't go back to that always gaming for it and always trying to get out of it."

Charla agrees: "It's a lot better than it used to be. I may be slow to the take, but it was a really meaningful lesson."

Douglas Brown suffers less stage fright than he once did. "There's much less of a sense of having to perform," he said. "After 100 days, that kind of melted away."

All the same, he doesn't recommend the experience to everyone. "I'm glad we did it. But as far as a practical message, nobody needs to do it 100 days. You don't have to climb Mount Everest to understand alpine sublime."
New York Times

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Sexy Walks "Keep men Off Scent"

2008-06-20T11:51:00.000-07:00

www.news.bbc.com.uk

A sexy swing of the hips may attract admiring glances, but it is not a covert sign a woman is ready to breed, according to researchers.

A Queen's University, Ontario, team examined volunteers' walks and the levels of sex hormones in their saliva.

They found those with alluring walks were the furthest away from ovulation.

A British expert said the research, featured by New Scientist magazine, supported the idea women disguise their fertility to deter unsuitable partners.

'Surprising results'

Women give a wide variety of subtle signals to men to advertise the fact that they are ready to conceive and Meghan Provost, the lead researcher, had expected a "sexy", hip-swinging walk to be one of those.

She analysed the gait of female volunteers, showed video clips to 40 men, asking them to rate the attractiveness of the way the women walked, and then matched the results to the hormone tests.

She said the results, published in the journal Archives of Sexual Behavior, were so surprising that she had repeated the experiment again with another group of male viewers.

The women who were most fertile at the time of the experiment walked with fewer hip movements and with their knees closer together.

She now thinks the findings tally with other research suggesting that women want to conceal their ovulation from males other than their chosen partner.

Monogamy

A sexy walk would be too obvious, so women are thought to use changes in smell and facial expressions that can be experienced only at close range.

Ms Provost said: "If women are trying to protect themselves from sexual assault at times of peak fertility, it would make sense for them to advertise attractiveness on a broad scale when they are not fertile."

Dr John Manning, from the University of Central Lancashire, agreed with this theory.

He said it was in a woman's best interests to form a closer attachment to one man to help raise children, rather than to advertise her fertile time and be approached by a larger number of competing males.

He said: "I think that the subtle signs of ovulation are used, in a sense, to promote monogamy.

"If you want to pick up on these, you have to be already living with, or close to, the woman, so this constrains the man into daily attendance on a woman."

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Understanding Online Adult Dating

2008-04-21T10:15:00.000-07:00

If you are looking for intimate encounters, online adult dating service is the one for you. Adult dating online is different to ordinary online dating because its profiles has sections for sexy photos of the members. You just need to register and presto! You will be able to contact other members through. Some services offered by online dating sites are similar with online adult dating sites.

Cybersex is often allowed in online adult dating. It is the act between online daters where they use sexually stimulating online communication. They tell each other their sexual fantasi es and sexual acts through typing the words in the computer. Cybersex is widely used by couples, married couples and those in relationships because they consider it exciting and pleasurable. Since cybersex is done online, it is also considered as the safest way of having safe sex.

The online adult dating has the following benefits:

• It gives shy and less sexually experienced people to convey their sexual sides.
• It is the safest place to practice safe sex.
• It will make you comfortable to deal with the cybersex partner because of its online.

Here’s the dangers of adult dating online:

• You don’t know the person your dealing with and their intimate The dangers of adult dating online are in not knowing the person you are dealing with and their sexual involvement.
• Many people get too seriously connected on adult dating online and get addicted with cybersex.
• Since cybersex is not healthy, it can ruin your physical sex life.
• It will deter you from having real physical relationships.

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